went on a few dates with an enm guy for the first time but to me he sounds like he doesn't know what he's doing, i just want to check here the extent to which i can take him seriously:

• when do you disclose rules of your relationship with third parties? what do you consider rules? e.g. do they live together? possibility to meet friends? can he stay over, is there a possibility to meet at their flat.. do you consider this reasonable from a guy in an enm relationship: "i cannot know which information is relevant to disclose to a third person i am seeing". do you expect to be asked specific questions for disclosure or is a general question enough (e.g. what are your rules?) or are you proactively disclosing?
• do i need to hear about his partner? what they do together, who he/she is.. is it ok to have a boundary on that? (he started to share his sex stories with his partner while we were in bed together)
• i asked him what he expects from an open relationship and why he is in one and he said he doesn't know (although they discussed thoroughly with his gf, he says).