I’m in a new relationship, we’re doing poly. He’s broken a boundary before by letting his ex come into his home without telling me where they apparently had an argument. I woke up to her tagging me in a video stomping on one of my belongings, and saying on a pic of me “he’s with me right now” We got over that hump but today he sends me a picture of messages he sent to someone Non binary, they sent him nudes. We never agreed to do anything with singles yet as we need to build trust. We’ve never been with couples either but I told him I don’t want to do single AFABs atm and he doesn’t want to play with single males. I said I don’t want to play with single AFABs immediately as I’ve never been with anyone with a vagina before and I wouldn’t want it to be a 3some because that feels like a straight guy fetish and I’d be more comfortable with playing with a couple to start as I feel that would make things a bit more even and would make me feel more comfortable. I’m bi but have only been with AMABs, so I’m upset that he went ahead and did this behind my back. We’re already getting over a tense period and this sets us back so much. He wouldn’t even allow me to go to a sex club alone when I just wanted to hang out and make friends and smoke. I’m pretty upset and idk what to do. He’s been great in a lot of ways but he’s triggering me in other ways and i think this is cheating. He’d be very upset if I was pursuing AMAB connections without his permission so I’m very upset. He said he wanted to “surprise me” and that he thought it was just with single females and that a non binary AFAB person would be ok, it’s not ok I feel like him trying to get a 3rd person who is AFAB but non binary is his way of getting what he wants which is two pussies at the same time.