My (25M) wife (25F) and I have recently been exploring the world of ENM.

We got married when we were 20 after dating after highschool. Last year we tried molly together and I confessed my bisexuality and my history with men before we dated.

She was surprisingly receptive (hard not to be on molly) but even the next day I just felt this feeling of acceptance I never thought I would receive. To this day she is the only other person who knows this side of me.

She confessed she is bi curious but didn’t seem very comfortable to explore that further so we left it there. I got a toy to play with that has been satisfying my needs for the last year.

We started playing with it together, fantasizing about a MMF bisexual threesome. For almost a year we would periodically role play this without outright saying what we were doing and why it was hot.

Finally last week, we started having a serious discussion about ENM.

To give some context, she had been in a highschool relationship for a year and a half when we first dated.

They had just broken up and we dated for 3 weeks. She ended up trying to work things out one last time with him and wound up seeing him behind my back during this time shortly before dumping me.

She was the second girl I ever dated and I was absolutely devastated. My first girlfriend had also used me as a rebound so I was convinced I just wasn’t meant to be a keeper.

10 months later, they broke up for the final time. During this 10 month period I had experimented with multiple partners of multiple genders.

I knew I was bi but convinced that sexual urges are more repressible than the romantic feelings I have for her when she first contacted me again.

I stopped everything with everyone as soon as we started hanging out again and it felt so right.

I had never stopped thinking about her the whole time and none of those physical connections filled the emotional gap she left.

We have had an amazing marriage and have a beautiful daughter, I couldn’t be happier with my decision.

But I would feel sick to my stomach every time I thought about men or wanted to watch a gay video.

So when she accepted this side of me, I felt for the first time in my life that I may not have to choose between my romantic feelings and my sexuality.

It felt wrong to even think I deserved to have it all, like that.

But our entire relationship I still felt a deep insecurity due to the “infidelity” trauma. I know in hindsight we were kids and we had only dated a few weeks, but alas I cannot cherry pick what traumatizes me.

Imagining an ENM lifestyle is the first time in my life that weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I am in control and we are doing this together.

Even just seeing how shy she is about looking at other men, etc. and slowly opening up has been beautiful.

She know I have been insecure in the past due to our past and also just regular man insecurities that occur before the frontal lobe develops, like that she only loves me because she hasn’t fucked anyone hotter.

It all seems so silly in hindsight and freeing to let go of.

And she has responded so well to all of this. I had the misconception for the longest time that guys who did this kind of stuff lost the respect of their wives, but I’m finding the contrary to be true. She is so attracted to the confidence that I am gaining from this.

And seeing her gain confidence as she realizes how desirable she is, and that other people besides me would love to be with her and enjoy her body is so hot.

Yesterday we watched a video for the first time together, and a trans jerkoff video happened to pop up on the pornhub feed.

She turned to me and said, “I’ve watched that kind of stuff before.” To hear my wife say that so bluntly and unashamed was one of the hottest moments of my life.

I told her I thought that trans women were extremely hot as well. We watched it together and it made her cum.

She wanted to cry after, as her attraction to trans women has been something she had been secretly ashamed of for years.

We were both raised very traditional and she has never experimented with her sexuality much. This whole time she had this repressed shame, that could have manifested into god knows what, but instead we now have a deeper connection than some monogamous couples reach in their whole marriage.

I love seeing her realize that she can let go of all of this shame and we can both enjoy life to the fullest with our soulmate.

We don’t have to let our parents or friends views of relationships dictate how we operate ours. Most of the people we were both raised by had miserable marriages that ended in divorce or indifference.

We are the happiest we have ever felt and the only caveat is trying to ignore the guilt/shame that what we are doing is wrong/unholy (slight religious trauma too lmao).

But anyhow, we are now at a point of comfort with each other we never knew possible and are more sexually compatible than we ever could have imagined.

Life is good :) Maybe now we get on feeld and just see whats out there. Definitely now rush lol but excited to see what the “lifestyle” scene in Memphis consists of!