Hello everyone, first time poster here and I apologize if this gets wordy. My wife and I have a wonderful marriage and love each other deeply. We have three kids together as well. Since we have been together I have been very open about my desire to have an MMF threesome with her. I have done it with partners past and loved the experience. As I said my wife has known about this desire for basically the entirety of our marriage. She has also said the idea “excites” her and that it turns her on thinking about being with two guys. However, she has also maintained that she just “feels too shy and awkward” to think she’ll ever be able to actually participate. She has a couple of hang ups.

1) although I desire to be with her in an MMF. She has no desire to see me with another woman. Despite how much I assure her to the contrary. She thinks I’ll eventually want reciprocation with an FFM. Again. I have been very consistent. This is not the case. My fantasies aren’t for FFMs.

2) she works as a professor at a university and she is terrified that’s we’d end up accidentally selecting a former or current student. On a related note we live in a fairly small city (about 50k) and she’s extremely worried we ended up with someone we know. She is worried about this because my suggestion is to find an anonymous guy on a dating website.

3) she is a parent and its “not something parents do”

4) sweetly, she is worried about my potential jealousy despite the fact that I have assured her I feel very confident in our relationship, have done this with partners past and it has not caused issues (our breakups were unrelated to sexual encounters.

I am trying to make her feel extremely comfortable . I haven’t pushed her into after 10 years of purely talking about it. I encourage her to dress sexy out and about, I have told her we don’t. Need to dive in. We could start by going out and having her dance with and intimately touch other people. I have suggested we start with simply having a potential partner watch.

Q. Is there anything I am doing that is unfair or pushy in this and is there anything that I can do, or does anyone have any tips for making this beautiful apprehensive woman of my dreams more comfortable in indulging herself?