Me and my husband have been together for about 3 years. We have fantastic sex. Both of us have told each other many times that this is the best sex of our lives.
The chemistry is strong and mutual attraction existed for about 7 years before we started dating.
However, there is a huge issue that we do not know how to solve. We even saw a therapist who focuses on sexual issues and didn’t get any solid advice.
My husband is into non-monogamy. He fantasizes about opening the relationship, seeing other people separately and also interacting with them together.
I am built completely differently. I never fantasize about anyone but my partner (have been this way all my life) and the idea of my partner touching someone else is painful to be.
Last summer I decided that I may be overreacting. We chatted with a girl online, met her in person and went home together.
I got shitfaced drunk and initiated a threesome. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. I am still haunted by the thoughts of him touching her. I was so traumatized that I couldn’t come into our bedroom for 5 days and my husband had to through the sheets out and all that.
The idea of him being with another woman absolutely crushes me.
He tells me that he loves me too much and that he will suppress his desires for the sake of being with me. However, I do want him to be happy.
I am wondering if there is any advice at all you folks can give me? I am sure our problem isn’t unique.
"No" is a complete sentence, OP. If you're not interested, stand your ground. I'm assuming you folks got married under a monogamous paradigm, so you certainly don't owe him anything in regard to nonmonogamy.
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