Hello! My husband and I are both bi. We’ve been together for five years and have dabbled a bit. We befriend another bi couple and had a few sexual encounters all together. We individually saw a person each previously as well.

My difficulty is coming from the envy I feel for his experiences versus mine. On Grindr or any other app, he matches with and hears from many men. He’s shy and I’ve helped him with talking and vanilla interactions with guys. I’m happy for him and I’m glad to help him.

However, my experience with finding women looking for women and interesting in this dynamic/me is pretty humbling. My husband also becomes uncomfortable with how warm and intimate I am towards dates. He says it looks too emotionally close to him. I’d really like to change my filters to include men. From casual dating in the past, it was much easier to enjoy the experience with more chances and easier to have a direct sexual partner. However, he doesn’t want me to even talk to someone with a penis. It feels so arbitrary and gate keepy to me. I’m feeling so envious and don’t want to just close it down. It’s more of I just want a chance to experience the easy ego boost, intimacy, and extra orgasms that he is getting. I’d love advice on addressing this and will probably share comments with my fella too. Please be gentle with us!