I (53F) have been dating someone (51M - let’s call him T) for about 10 months - we are both previously divorced and we both went into dating looking not only for companionship but also intimacy. On both fronts, things between us are great. I told him at the start I wasn’t interested in monogamy and he very much felt the same. So over the past months as we’ve grown closer we have had conversations about closing our relationship but we just haven’t. He’s dated several other women and I’ve dated two other men. With the last man, after we had sex, I realized my itch was scratched as it were. I relayed this information to T and he admitted that with all of the other women he’s dated since we’ve been together he’s had the same thought.

I have to admit-even if it’s just here- that I was skeptical about mine and T’s relationship lasting even this long without us being monogamous, but I really think that for me, having the option of getting that itch scratched feels really comfortable in a very surprising way. And after I’ve been with someone else or he has, the intimacy between us is even better.

Thanks for reading.