Welcome everyone!

Mod Team

I'm u/Mr_Secret_Name, my wife is u/Super_Secret_name, and our mod friends are u/Auto_Perv_mod and u/5f636f636b5f. The four of us have been modding some local subreddits (a swinger one, a couple of gone wild ones, and a couple for the two clothing optional beaches) for a few years now. We talked about setting up something that was between swinger and polyamory for our local area but then saw that this subreddit has been unmodded for a few years now. We tried to contact the previous owner of the sub but they are a couple of years absent. With the help of redditrequest, they handed the keys over to us.

So, who are we? My wife and I consider ourselves 'monogamish' now, though, we've been ENM for about nine years. We were once fully into the swinger lifestyle but the past few years have found that monogamish suits us a little better. But we never rule out what may come next so who knows.

u/Auto_Perv_mod, "I'm a go with the flow gal. I'm not tied to any one thing atm and it changes with whomever I'm with at the time and what we're comfortable with. I've been involved with ENM most of my adult life and can't imagine being monogamous."

u/5f636f636b5f. "HELLO! So who am I? Well let's see. I was raised in the LDS church and left the cult when I divorced my wife and promptly married my husband. Hard to stay in that bigoted church when you walk in as Adam and Steve. LOL. My husband is "fully gay" but respects my need for occasionally a woman's touch. My husband also is a bit of a wild animal and loves a good, sweaty orgy! We're fluid with our ENM and have experimented with swinging and poly and hothusband and stag outings."

Together, the four of us have found a pretty good groove as a mod team. We are defenders of "Don't yuck their yum", we all loathe spam with a passion, and we try to mod from a hands-off approach - as long as you don't break the rules.

We feel that these subs are YOUR communities and we are just here to help as we can, when we can. If you want to see something here, just ask. But please remember, we're only volunteers.

Our view of ENM?

Simply put, it's the big umbrella term for relationships where there is a third, or more, sexual partner(s) and everyone consents to the arrangement. This includes, but is not limited to: Swinging, Polyamory, Hotwife, Hothusband, Stag, Vixen, and Monogamish relationships.

Why this subreddit over r/Swingers or r/Polyamory or r/Hotwife or??

Those are specific to those subsets of ENM, and as we have all discovered, not everyone fits into these confined boxes. Also, the unfortunate thing about Reddit is that is that it's easy to find one's self veering slightly off of the subreddit's hive-mind and finding yourself with a negative outlook or feeling attacked.

How does this differ than the nonmonogamy sub?

Well, I'm not a fan of bashing on other subreddits but hopefully in time you'll find that we are good alternative for you. We don't have agendas nor will you find any of us recruiting for a particular style of ENM. As long as it's ethical, have fun!

What we won't allow

The rules are pretty self-explanatory minus one: NO soapboxing. It's generic for a reason. The whole, 'my way of ENM is better because' or trying to recruit someone because that's what you do, is not something we will condone here. Swinging works for some, not all. Polyamory works for some, not all. Hotwife/hothusband works for some, not all. And so on. And yes, there is a difference between telling someone that something works for you vs. recruiting them, see the aforementioned hive mind subreddit(s).

Why are the user flairs set up like that?

ENM is very subjective and therefore opinions are also very subjective. We believe that it is important for anyone giving advice to be forthcoming in their biases, or potential biases. Remember, what works for you is not necessarily what will work for someone else.

We're working on making these mandatory, if possible, so choose your flair asap.

Welcome everyone!