There was a woman on here once, a doctor. She’s roughly my age and posted frequently about her partner. I once texted her about her job and her post, indicating what a wonderfully wholesome slut she was when describing her working class boyfriend reminding her high-society roots what a man truly feels like. She blushed and kept raving abt his cock, his moves, and his vibe.

Their romance is one for a Hollywood movie. Not the Notebook type, but a cute Saturday afternoon Netflix romcom type. They’re sensual, in love, and insatiable. And every time I asked her for details, insidiously trying to steer the conversation to her and maybe getting to put a face to a username, she would bring up her fiancé and how great he fucked her last night or how she spent the day in bed with him cumming endlessly. And the ache would return.

The ache. The pitting feeling in my stomach that reminds me there are so many things and people I won’t experience, or haven’t yet. That the posts that are up here discussing kinks and risqué acts are either total fantasies, or have never been done because my previous partners were too shy. The ache is knowing that I can never have that, or them.

There is an animal in me than wants to escape the holds that my physicality put on it. Sometimes, it is successful. Average build, wealth, and average intellect, nothing sets me apart. And sometimes, that is what some are on here go for. We have our fun and go our ways. But every so often a post just hits right. Like the angle of refraction bouncing off my psyche is exactly at 45. They seem to know exactly what gets me off. And how to do so. Without ever having met me. And that’s when the ache returns.

There are some on here that understand sex and libido in a way that no partner of mine ever did. And my heart and cock ache for the tragedy that I’ll never get to experience that. Perhaps I should turn my gaze inward and look to chase experiences, get to know people for themselves and not as an opportunity to mold them into what I wish they could be. It’s a dangerous game. And sometimes, I just want to lay back and get lost in this again. Teasing myself. Edging to the fantasy that will never become a reality. For when that doctor posts about her fiancé fucking her in her tight scrubs, enveloping her plump ass with his fingers and pushing her asshole with his tongue, I’ll take notes.

Maybe, my ache will go towards something..productive. Maybe, I’ll be him to someone else. Until then, may the aches and pain be muffled. As are her moans when he slides into her perfect pussy as she lays on her stomach, gripping her sheets tightly. Praying to God for the angel she found