We met almost 7 years ago this month. Now we are laying in bed, him propped up in a nest of 5 pillows and me with my head on his chest listening to the slow lub-dub of his heart beating. It is crazy to think about how time flies but days and years with him feel like minutes. It has been two and half years since we have had the pleasure of seeing one another in person. He places his hand on top of mine, which lays on his impossibly chiseled abdomen, and his thumb moves like a windshield wiper across the back of my hand. The edge of his nail trailing across my hand sends chills down my spine as his other hands rubs soothing circles on my back. So often when I have felt distraught, I have closed my eyes and imagined the sound of his resting heartbeat and the feeling of him rubbing circles on my back. Now I sigh deeply as we watch Night on Planet Earth and the TV glows in the dark as bioluminescent fish flood the screen.

His right hand drifts upwards to find my chin and brings my lips to his. His lips are so soft yet there is something powerful and urgent about this kiss. Wrapped in his embrace, I am unable to break away and wouldn’t even if I could. He nibbles at my bottom lip as his adept fingers tangle in my curls. His kiss makes me start to feel like sap is pooling in the crotch of the lacy teal leotard I wore for him. I straddle him and grind my hips against his and feel his dick begin to harden in anticipation. His hands find their way under my satin dress, and he grips my thighs firmly as he grinds his hips in response. I break our kiss to pull my dress over my head.

“I remembered that you like to see me in bright colors,” I say bashfully, my heavy eyelids fluttering as though I am intoxicated by his presence. “I almost chose something pale pink.”

“You were right to choose this color,” he replies as his hands slide up my sides to my shoulders where he slips his index finger under the straps and begins to roll them down.

I shiver as my bare breasts are exposed. His hand on my lower back brings me toward him as his lips, tongue, and teeth find my nipple. I feel myself becoming even wetter and the fabric of my teddie beginning to stick between my legs. Our eyes, like warm pools of mud, meet as he hungrily sucks and the thumb of his free hand rubs circles on my buttocks and his pelvis grinds into mine.

I moan, and he pushes me off and on to my back. In one swift movement almost too fast for me to register, I am naked. My hands are trembling as I place them on my stomach. I have gained 80 lbs since we first met when I was 19. I like my body, it serves me well, but I do not look as if time has stood still the way he does. He senses my nervousness, and positions himself between my legs and leans in to kiss me. He leaves a trail of kisses from my clavicle to my engorged and waiting mons. As he comes to lay between my legs, he blows a stream of cool air on my slick slit. I shiver and giggle.

Gazing up at me from under his beautiful thick lashes he whispers, “I missed your pussy so much.”

He kisses my clitoris once, then again, and again. He gives me one long lick, and I feel his tongue slip inside of me mid-stroke so when he gets to the top of his lick my clit is left glistening in a thick coating of saliva and my own juices. He moans as he starts to lick me more ravenously. His moaning is like a low frequency vibration that drives me wild. He grabs my legs behind the knee and rocks my legs back. I feel his tongue find my asshole and begin probing. It makes me giggle again, but it also makes me want to tweak my own nipples. He releases my legs and goes back to my pussy.

He kisses my inner thigh twice, and I feel my juices coating his chin. He remembers how much I love it when he sucks on my clit. Two sure strong fingers part my labia and work their way inside of me. I arch my back and then thrust my pussy toward his face. I feel a tingling in my extremities and my breathe becomes short. He lays his head to one side on my pillowy thigh as my right hand finds the back of his head. My toes curl and uncurl as I start to squirm. Both of my hands grip the sheets and I squeeze his face between my thighs. He wraps his hands around my thrashing legs and pulls me closer. I swallow the scream I want to let out and instead let out a more controlled moan. The most delicious orgasm washes over me. My whole body feels flush with blood. My hands release the sheets and as I bring them up to my chest to feel my own heart beat. I close my eyes, because surely I have died and gone to heaven.

He comes to lay beside me and hold me. I find my face pressed to his chest with his arms encircling me. I try to slow my breathing by taking in the familiar warm clean scent of his skin and his detergent. I tilt my head back and away to see my juices coating his mouth. With my thumb I wipe some of my cum away. His long nimble tongue licks at the rest.

“I’ve missed the way your pussy tastes, babe. You’re just so clean and sweet,” he says as he kisses me.

“Really?” I ask. I swear that if I could blush, I would right now. Thank god we dimmed the lights anyway. He always makes me feel like I am 19 again and vulnerable and beautiful and perfect despite my imperfections.

“You have some of the best pussy I have ever tasted,” he says. He chuckles to himself before asking, “Do you remember when we first met, and you wouldn’t kiss me after I would licked your ass?”

I don’t remember this fact to be honest. I cannot imagine a time when I knew him and did not want to kiss him. It seems like we met and he’d had me at hello. He was my first in so many ways that have changed me for the better. He is the first man I have ever spent the night with. He is the first man to eat my ass. He is the man I’ve wanted to belong to and give every part of myself to for all these years.

In response to my quizzical expression he explains, “You used to ask me to rinse my mouth after I would lick your ass, even if you’d just showered. You used to think it was nasty.”

I sigh. He is probably right. “I guess I am less uptight now, but I don’t think I could ever find anything you do gross,” I say as my fingers find his half hard dick through his pants.

I don’t immediately reach to free his cock by pulling down his pants. Being teased is one of his favorite things. So I stroke his cock through the stretchy synthetic fabric of his athletic pants as I kiss his jawline. He rolls from his side facing me to his back. I draw circles around the head of his penis and run my acrylic nails up and down the shaft until his hips thrust involuntarily. I steal a kiss before pulling his shirt over his head. He has turned from his bronze summer shade to a paler winter Nuyorican. I kiss his smooth sculpted torso. I rub my nose back and forth and feel the vellus hairs on his skin just above the seam of his pants.

Down come his pants, and I am in awe. I have waited 2.5 years and traveled 200 miles to see this work of art live and in the flesh again. The head of his cock is so perfect, I cannot wait to devour him, and I don’t. He lets out an “oh” as I deepthroat him immediately. My tongue feels the familiar contour of his veins, and my mouth waters all the more. I gently massage his soft wrinkled scrotum, which makes him moan. I release his balls, and start to stroke his cock. One by one I suck on each ball. I hear him catch his breathe. Then I suck both into my mouth at the same time.

He hisses “Oh, baby.”

Once his cock and balls are properly wet, I suck on my finger before sliding it toward his prostate and lightly massaging the area around his asshole. I look up from my position kneeling and sucking to see him raise an eyebrow at me. I used to hate ass play, he is right. I hate and love how well we know one another. However, he is so immaculately groomed that I think I would lick his ass, if he asked me to now. But it seems that just massaging the region is enough stimulation. I feel his cock twitch in my mouth as his moaning grows louder. I pull away and strands of saliva trail from his cock to my lips.

As if reading my mind, he reaches for a tin full of condoms. I pick one in an orange wrapper, open it, and sheath his sword before I gingerly impale myself. This moment has long been awaited, and finally he is inside of me. This wonderful sensation radiates up and throughout my body. I ride him as he fondles my heaving breasts. Then I lean toward him, we are nose to nose. His rhythm is impeccable. Our bodies move in sync by picking up on almost imperceptible cues. He reminds that sex doesn’t have to hurt, that I can feel so uninhibited, and that I can receive as much pleasure from someone as they recieve from me. And as this revelation dawns on me, he smoothly shifts me on to my back. Again he grabs me behind the knees. This time he is holding on so tightly as he goes to town, I know that my legs will bruise. But I don’t care, I really am as happy as a clam.

“Flip over, baby,” he commands.

My hands are trembling like they always do with him. I roll over on to my stomach and raise myself to all fours. With firm hands he adjusts me to his liking, my face is down in his many pillows, and he props my ass up and toward him. I know what comes next, and there is no way to brace myself. His thick pulsing cock slams into my pussy. It knocks the wind out of me, in a good way. He holds my love handles (that’s what they’re for, right?) and has his way with me. My arms are folded neatly under my head as my hands tremble and grip my forearms. I feel his wet index finger slide inside my ass. Now it is my turn to let out an “oh.” I am not surprised, however. He has always been the type to want to fill every hole I have.

He slaps my ass hard, perhaps a little harder than is playful. I feel my pussy seize around his dick, and my ass sucks his finger deeper inside. He slaps my ass over and over. I think he likes it when my pussy squeezes his dick. He effortlessly pounds away at my poor pussy. I look back to see him transfixed by his own performance, watching his dick slide in and out of me. He hasn’t even broken a sweat and is starting to thrust more deeply. This is what I get for fucking a personal trainer. I moan and groan but try not to scream like I want to, because the walls are thin in New York City apartments. He slows down some and let’s me swivel my hips in doggy.

He leans forward, grabs me by the throat, and whispers “Did you miss my dick, baby?”

I am so weak with delight that I give a soft “Mmmhmm,” but that doesn’t satisfy him. He spanks me harder and says he couldn’t hear me.

“Yes, I missed your dick so fucking much,” I answer truthfully. “I really want to feel you cum inside of me.”

Surprised but still thrusting, he says, “I would love that. How?”

I pull away and his cock and finger slide out. He grabs a wet wipe for his hands. I wiggle my butt at him and spread my cheeks.

“Cum in my ass,” I offer.

And no sooner have the words left my mouth than do I feel him spit between my crack. I have not had anal sex since 2016. I think he is the only one I will ever let play with my ass truthfully. And even still, a finger is one thing to insert, but my ass initially resisted his girthy cock. He slowly inserts the head then part of the shaft. Now, I whimper a little, and he rubs my shoulders and bends to kiss my back to help me relax. He keeps massaging my shoulder and holds my hip with his other hand. Slowly I feel every last inch inside of me. The pain is not unbearable, although tears begin to well up. I feel full. In a sense, I like this feeling to a degree. I feel that I have fully surrendered to him. I am not as skilled at maneuvering during anal, but I clench and unclench my ass. He utters expletives under his breathe, and I know I am going to make him cum for me. He thrusts several more times as I feel his cock swell inside of me. He exhales deeply, and his breathe across my sweaty back feels cool. I arch my back and then lean back toward him. He kisses my neck, and I feel warmth flooding throughout my lower half.

“Thank you, baby,” he says breathlessly.

He pulls out. He lays down beside me where I am still collapsed on my stomach. He opens his arms inviting me to cuddle. He holds me close and kisses my forehead before I angle my face and he finds my lips in the darkness. Our sweat intermingles. Our legs interlace. I feel like I am 19 again and like I am a silly little girl who is so utterly and hopelessly infatuated and overstimulated but also so full, so safe and so seen.

“Happy Birthday, baby,” he whispers into my ear, making my spine tingle. And again he rubs soothing circles on my back as I melt into our embrace.