I have an online friend who has hypnotized me often. He was kind enough to record some custom files for me and I've been listening to them for a long time.

Over the last year or so (pronounced "lock-down") I have started a bit of a routine. Over time, he has sent me files which use my triggers. These are numbered with random-looking, long numbers, so it's not easy for me to know which file does what. Some of these are his voice. Some are other people. Some are synthesized. And many are blank ( a few seconds to a couple minutes of dead air).

Each morning I jump on Reddit and BDSMLR and some other sites. I queue up the play list. The first item in the list is either a blank file or a trigger to make me horny or just some music, depending on which item I pick (these are not numbered, but labeled so I can find them).

From that point, it is randomized. Sometimes, the next file is a blank file. Other times it is a trigger file. If it is blank, then the file after may be a trigger or not. But I never know which trigger. Or what it will do to me. Or how long before I get one.

I love not knowing what's next. The triggers hit me and maybe I find myself kneeing on the floor with nipple clamps edging. Or maybe there is some buried suggestion. Like for example, when I see a certain type of image, I react a certain way. Or maybe i feel compelled to repeat a mantra.

All of them are safe. And I know what they all do. But no knowing which one is next is a turn on for me.

I'm not sure if I have been compelled to do this or conditioned or it is just something I like. I suspect the latter, actually, since most of it was my idea.

Anyway, just wanted to tell someone. Hope you find something that works for you too!