i’m in a relationship but we’ve been long distance in the summer and are medium distance when i’m back for uni. i really had strong feelings for them but ever since a certain conversation/issue i feel like i’ve gotten more distant or cold. i still care for them and love them as a person but my romantic and even sexual desire for them has dropped a lot.

i think mental detaching from them has also caused my mind to run a little wild. as usual i’ve enjoyed getting high and feeding myself with thirsty people and porn videos and playing with myself. but i’ve noticed myself even fantasizing about getting intimate with people like my colleagues, one of which is a dilf in my eyes and one of which is simply just attractive as hell

the other is this guy i’ve actually had a crazy connection with all the way in japan through this language app. i also speak japanese so it’s been really fun and turns out he’s coming on a working holiday (or i guess he’s already arrived now) in the city i also go to university in. so i’ll be there by next saturday really early in the morning. funny thing is i’ve already somehow made plans to hangout with him that day.

part of me truly just sees this as a beautiful connection as friends. but on the other hand my b