TW: Suicidal thoughts.

Anyone else ever so fed up of their ED that they’re tempted to just not treat it next time they have a hypo? and instead just let your sugars drop to coma level?

like I’m still living at uni- my flat mates honestly wouldn’t even notice if I died until my body started to smell. Like I could lock my door and they’d be completely clueless

and my mum would probably notice after about 3 weeks because she wouldn’t have any random photos I sent her.

My grandparents are all such lovely people, and I try to call them atleast twice a week - but they run off the no news is good news - so they’d not notice either.

But I just think - I’d drop into a coma not know anything about it. I could then if there is a heaven see my dad again and we could make up. I wouldn’t be upset about food anymore, and if ppl would be over it soon enough.

And idk It’s just a thought

But I’m so exhausted- but idk if it’s worth mentioning to my team - bc it seems so trivial and silly.

I’m a whole ass 20 year old and don’t have a clue what I’m doing with my life. And spends my life panicking about food and that’s it. Rather dull and boring