tw for cussing, also this is kind of a help me and a vent/rant

I'm so fucking sick of it, getting dismissed by doctors, my hrt not working because of a gene I have on a chromosome that one would not think I (afab ftm) have (I have a Y chromosome), and I only recently found out this information looking at my raw dna file from 23andMe. It's making me severely depressed, and I have to wait 3 and a half more fucking months until I turn 18 to even be considered for an evaluation letter for top surgery from the GALAP. My PCP is refusing to refer me to a geneticist to confirm what my dna test is saying, because "[my] insurance won't cover it," and they're refusing to give me a referral for top surgery becaus I allegedly don't have a gender dysphoria diagnosis, even though I do. I can't afford to bind all the time and I just want my body to go through a second puberty already. I'm fucking sick of it, and I don't know what to do anymore.