I hate my body. I hate that I have to transition. If I was just born a girl or wasnt such a freaking coward and did things before it was too late I wouldnt be like this. It shouldn’t be a massive achievement every time someone says she. I wouldn’t want to throw up every time I see my face when it’s been to long without shaving.

I missed out on so much. So many important things spent feeling wrong in a suit cause I was born wrong. Proms, Graduations, funerals, weddings, concerts.

It’s all wrong. I’m wrong. I hate living like this so much. I guess it’s better than the other options of repressing or killing myself but it still sucks.

Most people just get to exist but I had to get screwed over with a broken brain or broken body that makes me hate living except when I spend hundreds on illegal medicine, and spend an hour on makeup and then just maybe i can not hate myself for a few hours before it fades.