To preface, my mother and I are usually pretty close but I am just at the end of my rope with her.

About eight months ago, I moved from my tiny hometown to a huge city for grad school and it has been riddled with obstacles and setbacks. I drained my savings and I sacrificed my relationship with the only person I have ever loved (different story for a different day) and my stability to be here. I've been really, really struggling as of late and coronavirus is definitely not helping anything.

Next fall, I am applying for PhD programs and my current university (a very small Catholic school) is not accepting any applications for new PhD students for the 2021 school year due to financial constraints created by COVID-19. In fact, many PhD offers for the 2020 school year have been rescinded because of COVID-19. Needless to say, I have been beyond frustrated because of the aforementioned struggles but also if I want to stay in my current city, I have to apply to a very prestigious university to the north of me which is practically a little Ivy (my grades are good but competition is stiff) or take a gap year and wait to apply to my current university when things "go back to normal" (not ideal but it is an option).

I called my mother tonight practically in tears because of the aforementioned struggles and because of the huge wrench COVID-19 created with academia. 99% of the time, I just want to vent to her but she always wants to interject her opinion while claiming to be an "empath." Here are some of the highlights from that conversation:

• "I don't know what to tell you."
• "If we're being honest here, you're being a little whine-ass." (This was after I told her that she was not being empathetic.)
• "How about you text me and tell me what you want me to say so I don't fuck it up next time." (She proceeded to hang up on me right afterwards.)

I just feel so hurt by her comments and I just don't know if I want to make up with her. She is probably the least compassionate person I have ever encountered and I have been seriously considering pulling away from her altogether. I truly do love my mother but I don't want to be around her if she makes me feel worse about my struggles. I'm just sad.