I am both terrified and honestly baffled by what this drug has shown me. It has proven what I have believed for what seems like most of my life. Now to preface some of this; I grew up Christian and believed in that religion for many many years until I had something horrible happen within my church group. It has led me astray from that belief. I will not go into the details but it was something evil that I haven’t been able to move past. Now to the point, I believe what most people have experienced on psychedelics (which proves my point in some manner). The simple belief is that we are all one, our soul is what created the universe. Which makes all of us the same “thing”, not person, but rather the same soul. Imagine, before our universe even existed, that there was a soul that existed. A single soul. What do you think that kind of existence would entail? To be so powerful, all-knowing, but also entirely alone and empty. What do you think you would do in that situation? Let me explain…my theory is that the “soul” that created this universe, created it so that it could essentially live what we call life. It created this universe so that it was not alone anymore, and so that it could strip all its knowledge away and truly live without knowing what is coming next. This is where it gets very scary. If you’ve ever heard of the egg theory, in short, it basically says that once we die; we are reincarnated into another life. It could be any life in any time period. So that means that everytime we are talking to another person, we are in a way talking to our own selves. Not one single person created the universe but rather the soul that is living through all of us did.

I’d like to go into what technology is now.

I remember when I was around the age of 18, my sibling asked what I would invest in if I had all the money in the world. I said what I believe is probably the most insane answer to a normal sane person. My answer was that I would create a machine, that had the ability to simulate a reality as real as ours. Why? What is the most precious thing we have on this world. The answer is none other than Time. What if, in theory, we created a machine that dilated time to such a degree that what we lived in the simulation was but a fragment of a second in our current reality? That would mean that we could live a million life times in the simulation but only a mere minute would pass in the “real world”. This is an insane thought. And I truly believe that is where we are headed as a civilization with technology. It is a slight spin-off of that game they play in Rick and Morty where they put on the headset and are put into a completely new life with a whole new story. Now I know that sounds ridiculous, and that silly episode is just a very small example of what I’m TRYING to elaborate on.

Let me pause and say that this is incredibly hard to put into words so please bear with me. The further you go into this realm on psychedelics, the less you can take back with you. It’s quite frustrating. And I’m doing my best to wrap my head around this thought.

Have you ever had a trip where you’ve seen a universe, inside a universe, inside a universe? That’s what technology is. It’s that we are constantly evolving, getting to the point of mastering technology that we simulate ourselves an entire new reality. So that we can avoid the unavoidable bringer of death, Time.

Now back to religion, because I want to touch on one thing. You know how in Christianity (and probably many other religions) it states, that God creates us, so that means WE are God? This is somewhat true. That doesn’t mean I am God, or anyone other specific person on this planet is. It means that God is all of us at the same time. Our souls is what created this universe, and we all share the same soul. Does that make sense or do I sound like a complete looney tune (lol). I feel insane typing this out but that is where everything that has happened in my life has lead me to believe.

Almost all of my k-holes where I’ve gone this deep has shown me the same thing. It has shown me infinity. It is a TERRIFYING thing to see and understand. Does time exist? I have no fucking clue. It’s a growing belief that the past, present, and future are all happening at the same time. So what does that mean for time? Well, that is for each individual person to interpret on their own. It’s a bizarre and almost impossible concept to even comprehend. And that’s the whole point of it. We are not suppose to understand why we are here or how even got here. If we did understand it, it would take away the entire meaning of life.

I have for awhile now, believed that no specific religion is true. But rather all religions are like vessels in our body. They all carry blood, in seperate routes, but all through the same heart. The heart represents God. So you could theoretically reach and know God through ANY religion. But it’s a slippery slope. I believe the Bible and many other religions contain man-made stories to manipulate the masses. It created power in government, and religion itself was manipulated by man for certain, I guess “people”, to hold power over others.

It really sucks if you ask me.

Now, since discovering this through a number of psychedelic experiences, it has made me absolutely petrified at the thought of death. Death is a fucking scary thing. Because all of us could be wrong. Something like our world might of never existed in any other universe. So we could be completely winging this whole thing and what is beyond death is utterly unknown.

I will wrap this up because this is such a long thought it kind of hurts my brain to type all this out. I know that sounds weird.

If this has taught me anything at all, it’s to genuinely love your neighbor. Because at some point, you will have to live on the other side of what you’re enacting on the world. It is exactly what Karma is. And Karma is real.

Part of me thinks I belong is a psych ward for even going this deep into the rabbit hole. And the other half believes that this knowledge is completely sacred and I’m not sure if I’m lucky or cursed to know any of this. I hope it’s the latter.

If you have read this far, thank you and please share your thoughts on my belief. What did I get wrong, where do you defer?

Heaven and Hell both exist but not in the sense of afterlife. It is currently something we as humans experience everyday. There really is a balance. There could be no Good without Evil existing simultaneously. The same way Light could not exist if Dark never existed.

I am doing my best to lean into the loving side of our world, but it so hard sometimes.

What I do know if life is fucking crazy. ❤️