I took MDMA over a week ago. I'm fully self aware. I started to hear voices and hallucinations when I took the 1g of mdma in a few hours. The next day I was sharing voices. Kinda like.. Distant music on a radio? I know it's my subconscious. It spoke very thought I almost hear it. And it's always music. I keep hearing Amy Winehouse back to black. It doesnt happen all the time. Just when im really sad. I hear distant music on a radio like in my fan orheater. I guess my brain interprets the fan noise as music? But I struggle to sleep. It not loud at all. Very distant and quiet. Almost like a speaker playing in another room. I don't want to go psychotic. I asked my dad if there's any history of schizophrenia but there isn't...

Like I'm hearing the music playing but I'm aware it's due to my brain chemistry.

But the voices continue. The music is comforting. Never voices. I've got an appointment 1st October, and I've started antidepressants but if I tell them. I'm hearing music don't wanna be admitted. Feel like it my subconscious reaching out. Idk. It's always positive, comforting.

Picked up alcoholism. Maybe that's effecting it?

Just don't want to end up delusional.

I'm aware of how it works. It's my subsoncious. But I hear it. Out loud. Just a little rant lol. I wish I never did drugs. Or did then responsibly. Everyone was telling me not to take mdma more than once every 3 months. I was neive. Now I'm deeply depressed. Hoping the meds do their magic. About a week ago or something (lose track of time) I consumed 1.7g of mdma. Just worried it triggered something. Only a doctor can tell but I have to wait till 1st.

And the issue I face is when I don't drink, I'm anxious I'm gonna like have a stroke or something. When I drink, the anxiety is fine but it intensifies depression. Spoke to woman on helpline today, told me I didn't sound drunk. Because I've got a tolerance - I am drinking like 500-700ml a day and I'm a small woman. But everyone doesn't get it. Dopamine.