I’ve been stuck for years. Since my last surgery. Was given Vicodin prior to my last surgery but they switched it to oxy this last operation. I did as the doctor said- after a couple months I started to question why I was still taking them. I don’t know why I thought ‘if I take them as directed I won’t become addicted because it’s not abuse’ anyway, over the next month or so, I tried to stop a handful of times. The first couple times I didn’t even realize they were withdrawals. Just felt kind of crappy and couldn’t sleep worth a damn. Ended up taking them to sleep. The next couple times things progressively got worse the more I tried to quit. Felt like death, everything coming out of me through every way imaginable (don’t imagine it- gross) anyway, told my doctor that I didn’t know why I was still in them and I felt like crap trying to stop and I think there was some dependency going on. Needless to say, he explained that he was not equipped to deal with these things. He did give me one suggestion, turned out that suggestion was himself. He was branching into private practice. His private practice did not accept my medical insurance though and that was that. Shortly after I was discharged completely with no direction and the prescription was just stripped away. Leaving me in the never ending loop. I’ve tried to stop a bunch since. I’ve tried a bunch of clinics. Medically Assisted Treatments mainly. Nothings really helped. Now, though, things are getting bad. And with all that’s been going on I’m worried about where it’ll take me if I don’t find a way to stop. I’ve been telling myself that I’ll lose my job for taking the time off to quit, then, I’ll loose my home because I won’t be able to pay, so on. Keeping me in said cycle.

Long story short,

I’m trying again. I’m just over it. But I have no support circle. I don’t talk to my family and they don’t talk to me. They rather me delete myself- so their input isn’t really an option. They don’t know about the whole medication thing either. But based on everything else it would only reinforce that terrible act they’ve told me to do. What I guess I’m trying to say/ask is if there’s anyone who’s been through the opioid detox cold turkey? Any pointers? Any motivation? And perhaps just use this thread as a medium to help talk me through it? I was still primarily using oxy, but it was street oxy, tested positive for fentanyl also (obviously)- but I was not doing heroin. Not that it’s any better, just trying to give an idea of where I am. Body aches, head aches, cold sweats, restlessness, yawning, eyes watering. Thats where I am right now but I know I’m not far off from the throwing up and dry heaving and… the other part. I’m just hoping the use of this community might help convince me that I can make it through. Advice?