I have been on estrogen and spirolactone for some 2.5 months before stopping cold-turkey on August 1st due to family pressure.

Feeling worse since then. The world is just so... dull, colorless and uninteresting, like depressive symptoms but not actually depressed, just like every emotion is toned down 2x. When on estrogen everything felt so colorful and stimulating, but without it it's just... Pale, bland and boring.

From time to time I crave estrogen, and whenever I think of gender and that I can maybe ever live as a woman the craving gets stronger. However, I do not identify as a fully binary trans woman as I have no intent of pursuing a "complete" gender transition.

I wonder if it's similar to the withdrawal symptoms of other soft drugs, and if I am addicted to estrogen.