M18. My buddies and I were hanging at the beach last night and we all had quite a few drinks. Everyone also took and snorted quite a bit Ritalin. Well, my Uber got back to my house at 12:30 and I had my last line at about 12. It’s currently 10am and I still can’t sleep.

I probably all in all had about 125mg, I weigh 135 and have absolutely no tolerance. I feel so fucking awful about myself. I guess the real reason I’m typing this out is just to get it off my chest. I just haven’t been this disappointed in myself in a long time. I know I’m being extra hard on myself cause of the come down but I can’t believe I did this shit. I know my drug habits out of control but what the fuck was this? I knowingly took too much of a substance I have very little experience with and I feel fucking awful and I earned.

I fucking know better! I always do. Most of the time I do something fucking dumb I did it knowing it was dumb! Idk man.

Sorry for the rant, I needed to put all this negativity somewhere. I’m just fucking sad and upset with myself. Fuck.