Doctors:
Hartnell- Vampire who wants to make me his thrall, but wants to do so politely

Troughton- Extremely Christian growing up, but found the spirituality of bongs

Pertweee- James May look-alike

Baker- Trans Masc Grandpa who wants to support his grandchildren

Davison- Motherfucker got that Hitler hair

Baker- Willy Wonka is getting desperate

McCoy- Dressed like the Riddler

McGann- Victorian era man out of time, looking for dead husband

Hurt- Iceman

Eccleston- Wants to put me in his BDSM dungeon

Tennant- First year college professor that stumbled onto something way bigger than he signed up for, also has a pocket full of meth

Smith- Gonna give me date rape drugs

Capaldi- Rock 'n' rollin grandpa

Whittaker- The evil lady from Umbrella Academy

Martin- She's a badass and is the boss behind everything,and she looks like means business

Tennant (2)- Local college professor gets confused after taking hard drugs for the first time

Gatwa- Sexy hunk of a man I want in my room

Companions:

Rose- Mean Girls reject who literally stole the show

Martha- Definitely not a witch... Why do you ask? Also rides a motorcycle.

Donna- Born to late to star in black and white films

Amy- Who let this teenager out?

Rory- College drug dealer

Clara- Looks like Sam from the Samsung waifu thing

Nardole- Where do I begin? Great Uncle who has managed to survive through a dozen different diseases including cancer. Owns a speedboat.

River- Disco star discovers the wonders of biking

Bill- Looks like Domino (from Deadpool)

Ryan- Local football athlete gets lost and ends up in the middle of a crime scene

Graham- Fought in the war, still owns the plane

Yaz- Fangirl who's just happy to be here

Mickey- Guy you meet at bar, and flirt with, is married with kids.

Jack Harkness- Respect the inventor of "The harkness test

Sarah Jane Smith (NuWho)- A mom who's daughter that wound up in the main plot but helps just because she's a good mom.

Sarah Jane Smith (Classic)- The daughter

Jackie Tyler- She feels like she's made of plastic

Wilf- The hobo they picked up from the street, they learned he has proficiency in firearms