be me, DM

5e

level 4 party which consists of a Dragonborn Paladin named Fulger, a Lizardfolk Monk named Yomie, a Halfling Fighter named Quark, and a Dwarf Cleric named Viktor

Party arrives in a quaint little town named Promise, where they meet Quark for the first time due to a party death the last session

Traveling to the local guild hall, they agree to take on a high paying job for an old Dwarven man to retrieve a stolen family heirloom

Meeting him at his home, he introduces himself only as “C” to the party after some prodding from Quark

This heirloom is a bronze bear claw, and should be deep in the cave system.

In the hills to the north lies a cave system that these thieves reside who swiped a precious artifact from his family.

The party sets out and after some brief encounters, see the entrance of the cave system guarded by 3 armored men with red and purple highlighted vestments with the sigil of an eagle’s head on their shoulder plate and pinned to their chests.

The party decides to be sneaky since they are in some lightly dense woods

Quark climbs a tree while the rest of the crew hide behind some rocks with the help of Yomie’s Pace Without Trace, due to his shadow arts from being a Shadow Monk

What transpired next was something I could have never expected, and would never think would work.

Quark throws a coin in the middle of the guards, in hopes to distract all of them to let the other boys to sneak in

”Ok, one guard picks the coin up and looks around at the surrounding forest, eyes narrowed” I say, hand in my face, not thinking this is a good plan

Yomie then casts minor illusion thanks to his shadow arts to project his voice through the coin

Viktor pipes in, and casts Thaumaturgy, causing the voice to become 3 times as loud

”I AM THE MIGHTY PENNY, WHO ART THOU TO TREAD IN MY CAVE?”

Viktor casts another effect of Thaumaturgy to cause small tremors in the ground beneath them, causing the guard holding the coin to drop it, all of them step away from the coin, a bit startled

”We are the Order of The Sanguine Bird, this is our convent!” The older guard chimes in, suspecting foul play here.

”YOU DARE INVOKE THE WRATH OF THE MIGHTY PENNY?! I HOLD THE POWER TO PLACE YOU IN A TRANCE YOU ALL WILL NEVER WAKE FROM!” Yomie says, through the coin

I have him roll for persuasion, and with the help of Viktor, casting Guidance, he scores a great 22

The youngest of the three guards panicked, and started to run into the cave to get his superior officer.

Fulger, being a Redemption Oath Paladin casts Sleep on the guard, causing him to drop, making the other two gasp in fright

“YOU SEE NOW THE PRICE FOR TREACHERY HEATHENS?!” The coin says, intimidatingly

The two men sprint into the forest in fright, seeing what they thought as their comrade dying from this celestial coin

Might I add that the table is in stitches at this point, everyone is laughing at how outlandish this improved plan is.

I’m very impressed, they were thinking of all this on the spot

So they then get the young gentlemen they put to sleep, tied him to the tree Quark had climbed and smacked him awake

Introducing themselves as followers of the God Penny, they say how their convent is trampling on holy ground.

A very mean interrogation takes place, they find out that this young man is named Damon Children, that his family lives in Promise, and he is working as a guard to provide money for his many siblings back home.

Using threats against his family as leverage, Damon began to weep and cry, begging to leave his family out of this, giving as much information about this place as he could.

This information included the name of his squad leader, the fact that the bronze claw is an “amulet of power” worn by the archmage of the convent, and some local political information about extra planar travel. (The party are newcomers to this continent, so they are not totally knowledgeable about the political state of the empire that owns these lands)

They also learn that this convent is open to all that wish to join, and are advocates of cultural integration.

”Glad to know we could have just talked this out rather than scar this poor kid” Quark’s player says, causing everyone to laugh more.

After many punches to the face and crying from Damon later, the party releases him and tell him to get out of here.

As Damon is jogging away, Yomie speaks from a coin that was placed on his person when he is out of earshot of the rest of the party.

”SPREAD THE WORD OF THE GOD PENNY OR FACE MY FURY”

The party then listens to the screams of Damon as he sprints into the woods

And with that, the party gained entrance to the convent.

”Boys... I think we may be the bad guys here... What we just did was something you’d read about in a character’s backstory.” Quark’s player says, to roaring laugher of the whole table.

And so the group came up with a name for the party, “The Followers of The God Penny”. If you want to hear more about this party, let me know in the comments, their attempts at sneaking in the convent were hilarious.