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(Game tales) The power of actual actors
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So I was talking to a friend of mine about a weird political situation. The southerners or Men of the Black Ice have been threatening war on the country my players inhabit. Being it's formost defenders and members of the Waxing Moon council they accepted a request from the king to help decide on a certain matter. So I was discussing this with some one of my friends. He's a 6 foot 5 heavy weigh boxer(Not a pro or anything) and also an actor. We were kind of goofing about when this came up. I told him about the situation and he said. "Well if you want to do it. Can I help?" I replied within an instant with a very clear "Huh?..." So we went over discussed a plan. Wrote some lines of dialogue, he even talked his girlfriend into this. Although she mentioned not needing much convincing.

You should know Arima is a large region to the south. About 1/3 of the kingdom.

DM: So there you sit in the large domed marble hall luxuriously decorated with leaf gold and portraits of kings long gone and one King currently in power. You are served drinks from silver goblets set with saphires and aquamarines.
Ranger: So your majesty what have we come here to discuss?
DM: "Well dear sir, We have gotten an envoy from the Southerners and have been requested by the Lord Speaker to converse with them."
DM: The king thinks a while then says "The Lord Speaker seemed quite pleased with the arrival of those Men of Black Ice. Though I hear one is a woman."
Rogue: How many soldiers are in the room?
DM: A total of 12 one for every pillar in the room.
Rogue: Oh right... I forgot. "Your majesty, how many will be coming?"
DM: "Only two from what we have heard."
Rogue: Turns to the rest of the party That should be good enough.
DM: Suddenly there is a knock on the door.
???: Actual knock on the door to the room
Cleric: It's open.
Party laughs at what they think is a coincidence
???: Tall woman dressed in furs walks in.
DM: Motions to her
DM: As you respond the door opens with a measured calmness and a tall southerner woman walks in followed closely by a cloaked and hunched over figure. She is clothed in furs and her long strawberry blond hair is braided in several places. The person next to her is wrapped in a ragged cloak and seems to be holding a decorated wooden box.
Ranger: Uh... Yeah I can see that
DM: The woman steps forward infront of the robed man and bows deeply and graciously.
Southerner Woman: Takes a deep bow
DM: She then says...
Southerner Woman: Warmest greetings honorable members of the Council and your royal highness. I am Hundra the Thunderer and this is Faltrus.
Ranger: Welcome. Are you the envoy the King spoke of?
Hundra: I am merely a translator. Faltrus here is the envoy.

At this point everyone has started to adjust to the new experience.

Hundra: Faltrus has come to discuss a proposition benificial for both our nations on behalf of our king, Crach of the South.
Cleric: Very well. Let us hear this proposition then.
DM: Hundra at this point turns to her companion and they whisper to each other.
Rogue: Uh yeah we can see that.
DM: Hundra then turns to you with a gentle smile and says...
Hundra: We have come to offer peace to your kingdom so that we may trade with one another a prosper as nations.
Ranger: That sounds wonderful..
DM: Hundra interupts you.
Hundra: We do however require a single thing.
Faltrus: Throws of his cloak and roars A-RI-MA! We want A-RI-MA! (I should mention that he is wearing furs as well except on most of his left arm which had been "engraved" runes using special effect scar liquid)

Now that the huge burly giant with blood thirsty eyes and a voice like an exploding vulcano has entered the stage. It becomes completely silent for a full 3 seconds

Hundra: Continues to smile casually
DM: Hundra then puts up one hand to signal for silence and takes the box
Hundra: Of course we do not expect you to turn it over to us without anything in return. Thus we have brought your royal highness a gift.
Opens the box and pulls out the axe inside To avoid further bloodshed between our peoples we suggest a single duel rather than a long a blood soaked war. We prefer to keep our lands and people safe. Faltrus Meanwhile has started challenging the players to duels.

Faltrus: You are meant to be mighty warriors no?! THEN DUEL ME!
FIGHT ME and claim Arima for yourself!
FIGHT ME COWARDS!
Rogue: Psh I'm sorry but we're not in the habit of fighting bears.
DM: Faltrus lunges forwards and as his fists pound the table it gives way and shatters.

I pick up my binder of the table just as Faltrus' arms crash down on the table breaking it and making it slump in half in the middle of the room. Dice go flying and people jump off their chairs.

Hundra: We will send three more gifts. After that. It will be war. It was my honor to translate to you fine members of the council and your majesty.
DM: Hundra bows deeply to all of you then turns around and leaves as the doors are held open for them. Faltrus watches her go and follows only when she is gone completely from sight.

An awkward silence follows which ends in a break as I go to thank Faltrus and Hundra for their services and show them the snacks and the TV where they can rest after their performance.
They wanted to stay around to talk to the players about it.

Comments
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No of course not... I had someone else break it for me.

Now I realise that sounds weird, but I weakened the table so it wouldn't hurt my friend's forearms.

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I think the quote "well I shat my pants, but worth." Encompassed their feelings pretty well.

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Violent scream of pain I FOUND ONE!

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We had planned this. So yes I did have another table (We switched out table during the break)

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Didn't mean to raise bar in general. I apologise if this has caused you any form of unease.

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He smashes the table and... The screws fall out and it's mostly cardboard :D

But yeah don't try this at home Go to a friends house.

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Oh definitely!

This guy just really has advantage on intimidation.

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I think that's actually far more impressive than having someone crush your table to scare a few people. Faking an entire language?

Maybe I should step up my game.

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Right shit. Arima is the southern region of the Kingdom.

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That... is fucking awesome.

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In the wise words of Matthew Collvile why write when you can steal something better.

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XD I didn't copy over the entire campaign from the Blade Itself.

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For the best result I suggest spring loading the skeletons.

And of course before they open the door you shout "RISE MY SKELETON ARMY" and then when they open it a bunch of skeletons jump them.

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Yup. Though in this case it worked out nicely that te circumstances basically perfectly aligned to set up this scene. "The perfect crime."

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That I did. Can I just say it was just as glorious in person?

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Almost yes. I was wondering if anyone was gonna catch that.

Though I couldn't have my friend stab himself (no matter how intimidating that would be)

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Basically yes. Can't always predict what players are gonna do, but it was lucky to turn out that it mirrors the book so closely.

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