It’s come to my attention that our recently separated and divorced wives never realized what they had. On the other hand I see a great number of us who solely miss the comfort and care. There’s a reason I sat that.

Let’s start on us: I’m the dead bedroom kind of soon-to-be divorcee. Luckily I have my health, educated and have a good job.

In the last week alone, I’ve had to discern why the internet was out (modem needed turned off/on), how to fix a bike and raise a seat, why the toilet won’t stop running…. I think you get the point.

My wife recently told me how helpless she feels. To me that’s indirectly her saying “wow, I took you for granted.” She just can’t muster it up to say it.

Now let’s talk about her. She would be gone 14 or so weekends per year (while we have two young kids). She’d be volunteering as a sport’s judge. Sure, they paid for food and travel but it was strictly volunteer. Gone was any physicality in our marriage too.

My realization. I really don’t feel all that different to those weekends she was out of town. I feel anger because she never would listen when I begged for her time. My therapist is telling me she is selfish and just doesn’t know better.

So now I’m alone a lot more. I just needed that support and to make love more than once per month (and that was duty sex). I feel she just wants a mildly handy roommate who would help with the kids. At some point I’m going to have to tell her to figure it out because it’s not my problem any more

The sad part, for me, is that now that I have the kids on the weekends, she’s going to even more events. So, I guess Linus has his blanket.