My ex and I own a business and a house together, and have two children. I have been done living in my town for more than a decade, but due to my wife, my kids, and my business, I stayed.

With the divorce playing havoc on my finances, I am not in a position to buy her out of the business. Given the only thing keeping my in this town is the kids, I have decided to offer her the business and the house, in exchange for custody of the kids, so I can move interstate to be closer to my family. She can have them during school holidays, I will have them during school terms.

It was my lawyer who initially suggested this, and she did tell her lawyer that I wanted to relocate. Now she is saying I shouldn't make the offer, because it might be seen as "blackmail". I'm wondering is the lawyer is saying this because if she accepted, she won't get paid as much!

I still think the offer is worth making:

• My ex will be financially better if she keeps the business and house and doesn't have to pay me out.
• She's already bitter, so upsetting her with the offer loses me nothing.
• If she refuses, I can still pursue the legal routes, which I believe I have a good chance with as I have lots of evidence showing her parenting deficiencies. (Nothing serious like drugs or abuse, but it would be hard to argue that she is a better parent).

I don't want any discussion of whether the kids would be better with two parents or not, I wouldn't do this if I didn't think the kids would be fine. I'm wondering though whether my lawyer is right, or if I should just make the offer to her.