Coming soon - Get a detailed view of why an account is flagged as spam!
view details

This post has been de-listed

It is no longer included in search results and normal feeds (front page, hot posts, subreddit posts, etc). It remains visible only via the author's post history.

5
The grass is not always greener (California)
Author Summary
shakespeareanff is in California
Post Body

So my wife, or my STBX, just moved out yesterday, and I can't help but feel lost.

BACKSTORY: I'm 28, wife is 26. We dated for 3 years, and have been married for 1. She was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. She made me a better person and was a great role model and step mother for my daughter.

Since we have been together, things have gotten harder. I found out that I am not biologically the father for my daughter (after 5 years), and got basically the bare minimum of custodial time in court. Since then, there have been several run ins between my wife and bio mom. The last straw was when bio mom spit in my wife's face and told her that "you can't prove it". The police got involved and now we pick up and drop off at police stations in our towns.

Fast forward to a month ago, I saw a text from one of my wife's male coworkers that was flirtatious in nature. When I inquired further, she admitted that they had kissed.

The point we are at now, she just found a place and moved out. She was hardly home, if at all, and I never saw her. She wants to talk about how we are going to handle finances, insurance, and discuss signing divorce papers, and of course how we are going to tell my daughter.

I'm at a total loss. My life is incredibly complicated, but she was the one thing I've been sure about since day one. She's a great step mom, my daughter loves her so much. But how can someone just turn their back on that? How do you just decide that with as bad as things are with my coparenting relationship, the better alternative is to just walk away? And now she wants to discuss me still allowing her to spend time with my daughter. Part of me is hurt and thinks if she doesn't want to be a part of this family, then she walks away from everything, but is that fair to my daughter, or would it be confusing for a 6 year old?

I'm just so lost. I feel like she sees this young single guy at work and ho doesn't have kids and she is trading up. Like I was a stepping stone. But I took the vows to heart. I meant them. I love this woman with all my heart. I tell her every day, via text, that I love her and that I'm here if she needs anything; most days I don't get a response. I'm still wearing my ring. This sucks...

Author
Account Strength
100%
Account Age
16 years
Verified Email
Yes
Verified Flair
No
Total Karma
14,509
Link Karma
590
Comment Karma
13,823
Profile updated: 1 day ago
Posts updated: 2 months ago

Subreddit

Post Details

Location
We try to extract some basic information from the post title. This is not always successful or accurate, please use your best judgement and compare these values to the post title and body for confirmation.
Posted
7 years ago