I just found messages on my husbands phone stating he’s been paying for sex. When I brought them to his attention he says that he was only trying to find a place to stay because I had told him we needed to separate due to previous acts of infidelity and his willingness to allow me to handle everything in the relationship. On March 10th I gave him a deadline of june 10th to be out of the house. Since then we have been working on our communication and spending more and more time together. I had been thinking of calling off the separation and continuing down this positive path until I found those messages. I am also pregnant with our first child and don’t want make any harsh decisions that would negatively impact her. I just don’t see myself trusting him ever again.

Update: he cut himself and refuses to go get help. They aren’t deep cuts but I’m concerned about his mental state.

Update: after meeting with my therapist and talking about it I know what needs to be done. I have made him aware that he needs to have his own insurance and phone bill (both are in my name) he is now telling me that by doing that I am trying to keep him away from our daughter. I told him that as a 30 yr old man it is his responsibility to maintain himself and the necessary utilities to do so. I find it laughable now that I have had some soul searching before I would have fell for it and told him he didn’t have to do it. Now i realize he’s gonna be they type parent he will be and that its not my responsibility to keep him up and it feels great. I can’t wait until I have the money to file for a divorce especially seeing as now he’s refusing to leave stating the laws of our state on marital property.