Back in July of last year, my xh left. I was angry, heartbroken, and ultimately shattered. The grief that I experienced felt like it would swallow me whole; I didn't think I was going to survive it. Then...things happened and I realized the person I had married was not the person I was divorcing, and even tho I had been with my xh for nearly 5 years at the time he left...the person I was divorcing was a complete stranger. The judge signed the papers today, and not only do I have my last name back but I also have my fucking voice again.

The one thing that I have wanted to say for months on here, is to share about the fact to be mindful of what you post as your ex-spouse could take photos and try to use your posts against you in the divorce process. To this day I have zero understanding as to why xh did it, as they held no bearing in the case. Though I will say having to explain BDSM terms (as a BDSM-themed post I had written was submitted to my lawyer via my xh lawyer) to my lawyer was a nice highlight of this divorce process. (Seriously, if you're reading this and you're my xh...go fuck yourself for that bullshit).

Let me leave you with this advice: it gets better. The anger, resentment, and pain eventually become bearable and in time you won't feel them as strongly, if at all. Don't fight the grieving process, allow yourself to cry even if it's over making yourself a sandwich. Know there are going to be bumps in the road, with you having to adjust to a new way of life, but don't forget to celebrate your achievements. It's okay to be the villain in their story, you have no control over anything but yourself. Go to therapy. Heal from the loss you've experienced, and water your roots to grow into the amazing person you have always been.

You were all amazing at the beginning of my divorce process and I cannot thank this community enough. You all are amazing, and so many good vibes are being sent to all of us along the way. Thank you all so much ♡ ̆̈