So we’re married and we have fun, a lot of fun. But I’ve been expressing that I’d prefer if there was some emotion present when I’m with someone and not just strictly physical.

I’m not trying to complain, but for me, I know that I’d be able to let loose faster, become wilder, and just more in my element with some emotion there.

He doesn’t struggle with that (figures).

So he’s telling me to find a boyfriend. And it sounds hot. And fun. And wild. And they’ll be a ton of sex. And all the things. But it also feels super nerve wrecking and scary.

I’m not super sure why but the thought of multiple boyfriends instead of just one seems more fitting for me. Maybe because there’s a little bit of connecting but not letting it get too deep.