The last cis guy I hooked up with ended up not being that into me, and I can’t stop thinking about it. He’s bisexual but leans gay, and thought we would be very sexually compatible because I pass as male. I didnt disclose that I still have my tits and I think he was kinda turned off by them. We had decided not to exchange pics before hand, so overall I think he was kinda disappointed that I was more femme than he expected. I thought it was clear from my pics that I’m Afab, but maybe he even expected me to have a dick. I went to his house & I was pretty nervous bc I hadn’t fucked anyone in a while. He’d gotten tested so I was prepared to take it raw, but I wasn’t feeling up for penetration in my pussy that day bc very occasionally it’s a bit painful for me. I really wish I had been up for it bc I think it would have made it more worthwhile for him, and we could have hooked up again. He has some ED, so after making out & he took off my shirt he went kinda soft after playing with my tits. He enjoyed eating and sucking me & I came from it. I offered to suck him while he was soft but he wanted to get hard himself. He asked if he could watch me play with myself so we did mutual masturbation for a while & I asked him more about his type. He said he was into really big dicks & masc guys, or for women MILF type with big tits. I realized I wasn’t either of those categories and it made me really turned on. I told him I was into the degradation of my partner watching porn of the thing they really wanted, so we went from the bedroom to the living room where he had his computer. It was by the front of the house and next to a big window, and I kneeled down so I wasn’t visible but someone on the sidewalk could have seen him. He put on lesbian porn while I sucked him. He wasn’t too big so I could fit it all in and hold my head down.

I wanted him to be more aggressive and really use my face, but he was pretty gentle. I did some slapping his dick on my face & really worshiping his balls. He did end up calling me a good cocksucker & a faggot , which he must have felt like was a stretch & part of the fantasy for him. After he came in my mouth, I put my clothes back on & left pretty shortly. Putting my pants on over my wet, unfucked pussy felt degrading. Even though I’d said I didn’t want penetration, I’m not sure he even would have wanted to fuck it. I texted him a few weeks later saying I was ready for him to fuck my pussy. He said he was interested but never followed up to schedule a time. I think about it now & then & about offering again. What else I would have to offer to make it more appealing to him? Do I have to beg to come over and be his cocksleeve? Maybe I have to earn it by being his booty call being available late at night or on short notice? He lives 30 minutes away from me too. I imagine how horny I would be driving over there when he texts me. Maybe I would have to use my vibe on the drive to make sure I was lubed up in case he wanted it. I also imagine how hot it would be to drive home afterwards, especially if he just had me suck him off again and didn’t even look at my pussy. My partner would have to watch me make myself cum when I got home & they could degrade me too for being such a desperate slut & refuse to help.

Maybe he would want me to keep my shirt on in the future & not look at my tits this time. Or maybe he could really amuse himself by having me stand in front of him & watching porn with a woman with beautiful tits and comparing them to how saggy and hairy mine are. I love to have them slapped or being told to jump up & down to have them jiggle around. I wonder if he ever thinks about me while he watches porn & wishes he had a tranny flesh light to use right then.