So just had a massive lecture and argument with my parents. Feeling absolute shit afterwards and wanted to try and fix myself. I'm at university right now and love the independence I get but for a while now I have ways had issues with my dad and the way I get along with my immediate family. My extended family are great but I have major issues with my close family and am not close to them at all. They love my greatly but never show it and always focus on the negatives. (Asian) After the argument today my parents and sister pointed out that I'm the reason the family is having issues and am always selfish and arrogant with them. However with my friends I'm known as the complete opposite and one of the kindest and most caring people and my family always say I should be more like that with them but I just can't. I have had counselling but it hasn't helped much and want advice on how to go about turning myself into a better person on both sides rather than being that guy my parents view me as.

Cheers