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This script is copyrighted by and is the intellectual property of Dvaledrik aka Dvaledrik_Returns. Permission is granted to record an audio version of this script and post it to the audio community here on reddit only, and only when properly crediting me, the author. If you wish to use this script beyond here, please see what I pinned in my subreddit r/DeathlyCoven, it should cover everything you need to know.

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Wedding Vows

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Written by /u/Dvaledrik_Returns intended as Script Offer for r/GoneWildAudible & r/pillowtalkaudio for anyone to voice act if they wish.

Feel free to use any cutesy pet names, make any changes to suit your locality and improvise if you wish! All characters depicted are fictional and 18 and actions (including implied) taken place are between consenting adults.

SFX are encouraged but not mandatory, things in asterisks are to aid the emotions.

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Helpful tags!

[Script Offer] [M4F] Wedding Vows [Bro] [Scrap That] [I Got Nothing] [This Better Be An Emergency] [I Should Be Coming to YOU For Advice] [Obnoxious Laugh] [Cheeky] [Boldness] [Tenderness] [I Hope That's How She Sees Me Too]

Synopsis: Your wedding is a week away and you're struggling to write your wedding vow, your friend then rings you to ask for marital advice, which certainly doesn't make this ordeal any easier.

Notes: S L O W D O W N. B R E A T H E B E T W E E N S E N T E N C E S. Be as extra as you want!

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Hmmm hmmm hmmm.

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Hmmm hmmm.

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*long sigh, annoyed*

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I did everything you asked for, why do I still have to write this?

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Arghhhhhhh.

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Hmm.

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Uh, I love you because uh, I get to see you first thing in the morning and last thing before I go to bed.

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Hmmm.

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Nope nope nope scrap that.

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She gon' be like "oh so am I just a roommate to you then?"

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Uh...

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I love you because uh, you make the week bearable, and I get to come home to you everyday.

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And uh, you ain't cray cray and you smell good.

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Hmmm.

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Nah she ain't gonna like that, "oh so I'm a pet am I?"

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Mmmm.

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Uhhh.

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You remind me to make dentist appointments *and* stick to them.

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Uhhhh.

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No she's *definitely* not gonna like that, "oh so I'm a butler now?"

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Mmm.

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ARRRRHGGHGHH!!

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Man I got nothing!

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*phone vibrates*

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Hmm?

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Who's calling me?

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This better be an emergency.

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*taps/swipe to pick up call*

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'Yeeello?

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You ok bro?

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'Cause this better be an emergency!

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You know I don't like unscheduled calls!

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Hmm?

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Oh.

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You had a fight with your missus.

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What you calling me for?

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You're the one that's married, if anything *I* should be the one coming to *you* for advice!

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Hmm?

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Right.

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K.

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Uh huh.

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Oh....

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Yeah bro.

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You fucked up.

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*laughs obnoxiously*

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Of course this shit's funny.

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Oh how the tables have turned.

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What?

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Nah bro this ain't something that a bouquet can fix.

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Ok OK I'll stop laughing.

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Just one more time.

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*laughs again, even louder and more obnoxiously*

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OK I'm done.

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Yeah you shouldn't have said that.

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Even I know that's a big no no.

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Huh?

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*start to get serious*

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Seriously?

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You're ringing me, a week before *my* wedding, to talk about *your* marital problems?

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Bro I ain't getting into that!

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Talk to a therapist or something!

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Me?

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What do I remember about the early days?

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Like how early are we talking about?

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Oh.

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*That* early?

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Uhhhh.

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That was a long time ago, you're putting me on the spot here.

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Well if there's anything I remember....

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*deep breathe, really thinking*

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Is that I never felt like I had to pretend to be someone else when I was around her.

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And that...

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The air seems lighter, and easier to breathe.

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Colors are brighter.

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And that....

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Even if it doesn't work out between us...

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Somehow, I just know that she's not going to flip out on me and go all.... berserk...

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Heck we even talked about that, and there was no pressure, no nothing.

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All cards on the table, ya know.

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Still...

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Despite all the boldness that she has...

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There's a tenderness that kinda...

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Makes me want to protect her even more, even if she's completely capable.

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I don't know how to describe this, but it actually makes me feel pretty prideful of being the source of her security ya know.

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Like, I hope that's how she sees me too?

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Heck that *better* be how she sees me!

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But eh.

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You know what I mean?

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Oh?

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You gotta go now?

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For real, you sure you OK?

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Ah.

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OK.

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Tell your missus I say hi.

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*swipes/taps to end phone call*

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Right.

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Where was I?

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Hmmmmm.

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Nope still got nothing!

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Break time!

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What time is it?

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*looks at the time*

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OK....

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I think I can still sneak in a bit of gaming before she gets home.

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Right.

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Where's my controller/Xbox/Switch/Nintendo?