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This script is copyrighted by and is the intellectual property of Dvaledrik aka Dvaledrik_Returns. Permission is granted to record an audio version of this script and post it to the audio community here on reddit only, and only when properly crediting me, the author. If you wish to use this script beyond here, please see what I pinned in my subreddit r/DeathlyCoven, it should cover everything you need to know.

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Meatballs

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Written by /u/Dvaledrik_Returns intended as Script Offer for r/PillowTalkAudio & r/GoneWildAudible for anyone to voice act if they wish.

Feel free to use any cutesy pet names, make any changes to suit your locality and improvise if you wish! All characters depicted are fictional and 18 and actions (including implied) taken place are between consenting adults.

SFX are encouraged but not mandatory, things in asterisks are to aid the emotions.

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Helpful tags!

[Script Offer] [M4F] Meatballs [BFE] [Husband Experience] [Protective] [Pouty] [Wholesome] [Goofy] [Tater Tot] [Shortcake] [Dinner's Almost Ready] [Food History] [Tender] [Oops] [Embarrassed] [Pop Culture Reference] [No Such Thing As Too Much Garlic] [Spaghet] [Domestic Bliss] [Slice of Life] [Two Dum Dums in Love]

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Synopsis: You are nearly done making dinner and your boo walks through the door just in time, just another day in domestic paradise for two dum dums in love.

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Welcome home tater tot!

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*peck*

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How was work?

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Dinner's almost ready.

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No no no no no you can't peek!

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Yes I know you can smell it, but no no no, no peeking~!

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Why don't you sit down on the couch and I'll bring you something to drink.

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What would you like?

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We got, sparkling white grape juice, or the red one if you prefer.

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Oh?

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Sure shortcake, we can do that, be back in a tick.

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Here you go.

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Hmm?

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Funny that you'd ask that, but nope, it's not what you think it is.

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What vigilant nose you have, darling.

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Yeah I did use basil, is it that strong?

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*sniff sniff*

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Hmm, you're right.

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I guess I've been cooking for so long that that I've gotten immune to it.

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Still, better than the time I used too many onions huh.

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Hey, there's no such thing as too much garlic.

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They have a soup made from ground garlic you know, it's not common but it exists!

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I could make it, but the house will smell like a giant garlic for days.

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I mean hey, at least it'd give you a legit reason to buy these scented candles you saved in your shopping cart?

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I ain't snooping, I'm just saying, if you don't want me to look then just log off!

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Hey, Incognito Mode exists you know.

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Hmmmf.

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*egg timer sfx or just a ding! sound will do*

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Ooh, it's ready.

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Table's already set darling, I'll let you know when it's done.

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*happily hums a tune, then suddenly very nervous*

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Oops!

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I'm OK, it's just, I was so focused on perfecting the sauce I almost forgot to make the other part of it.

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Hmm?

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Remember the other day, you told me one of your favorite films growing up?

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Yeah that one.

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Yeah I wanted to recreate that dish.

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Not that we're going to be both eating off the same plate, but you know what I mean.

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Still, who makes spaghetti and meatballs without the pasta?

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*really embarrassed and pouty*

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I was looking up recipes from different sites to see which one's more to your liking and uh...

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I even sliced the onion and garlic really thin so the flavor would be melted into the marinara sauce!

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*pouty sigh*

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Oh well~

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Dinner will be ready in another 10 minutes or so.

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I just gotta boil the pasta al dente style then we'll be sussed!

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Thanks.

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*pecks*

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*give it like 2 seconds pause*

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Here we are!

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Heeere's the dish that displeases all the chefs in Italy!

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Spaghetti and meatballs~ made just for you.

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OK for us, but you know what I mean.

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Oh?

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The Parmesan?

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Darling we are not using the pantry variety tonight.

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I just thought it'd be neat to try and use that cheese from the deli aisle we got the other day?

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Oh no no, we are not using a grater darling.

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Remember that little cheese slicer?

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Yeah, I wanna try that out.

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And here~ we go!

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Ahh it slides off so well!

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I can do this aaaaall day!

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Oops?

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Um, I think I may have overdone it on mine, you want some?

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OK.

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*pouty*

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Heeey now I don't have enough cheese on my spaghet~~!

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Hmmmf.

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Nah you're good love.

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Dig in before it gets cold.

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You like it?

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Good.

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You know, if I were to make it again, I'm gonna try it with different combinations of meat.

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Yeah, don't you know?

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It's not just ground beef, you can combine it with Italian sausage too.

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'Course you have to like, cut open the sausages and peel the skin off first, but still, the flavor will be more intense!

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You know, meatballs didn't use to be this size.

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When the Italians immigrated to the US, they were all from the poorer regions of Italy.

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So when their living standards improved, the meatballs just got bigger and bigger.

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Yeah, actually it used to be almost like, half breadcrumbs half meat, that's how they used to stretch the resources back then.

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It's amazing how a lot of dishes we eat today are considered peasant food at the time.

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Yeah.

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I mean, like ratatouille wasn't something you'd make with fancy kitchen items like the mandolin.

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It was whatever was growing in the garden at the time you know, self sustained living?

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Take minestrone for example, people keep arguing about its authenticity.

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Oh yeah, some argued that it's not real minestrone if you add meat to it 'cause apparently it's strictly vegetarian.

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Then they get into the whole nitpicking warfare on what broth is it made from, do you add pasta to it, all that.

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I mean, food is constantly evolving, just make whatever tastes good you know?

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Oh?

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Oh yeah, I forget to eat when I talk about things like this.

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You know how passionate I get when it comes to subject of food authenticity!

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Cheers, my love, for putting up with my foodie shenanigans.

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*glasses clinking sound*