Just thought I'd give an update after a post history full of despair. I'm the HL, he's the LL, mostly because of attachment issues. I felt completely broken, with a shattered self esteem, the thought of sex gave me anxiety attacks, after years of rejection.

I asked for a divorce. He asked if we could live together and keep being a family for the kids' sake, and I agreed. Our relationship was over... but a new one started.

Turns out that when the worst things are already said, communicating about everything else becomes relatively easy. Turns out that when intimacy is not a duty anymore, it becomes something you want.

My husband is working hard on his attachment issues and is already a much warmer person. I'm working on my self esteem and issues with sexuality, with good help from a loving friend that I feel free to explore with because he respects the strict boundaries I still have.

There is so much love in my life right now, and I'm really hopeful about the future. My husband and I are so close now, and I know we'll get even closer, but with more freedom than before.

This community has been such great support all the way. I don't think my bedroom can be described as dead anymore, and there are so many adventures I can't wait to explore... But you people are awesome, so I think I'll stay (ooh, look, spontaneous poem!).