I'm not sure if I should be posting here.. or r/adultery but.. whatever.

So, my SO left town for a little 2 day getaway this weekend. On Friday night, I pushed aside all of my nervousness and self doubt, and went out on a Date with a WONDERFUL woman that I met. We hit it off EXTREMELY well. One of the best nights I have had in as long as I can remember.

Fast forward to Last night, when SO gets home. She's acting kind of weird... but I'm used to that. At some point, we sit down on the couch to watch a movie.. Her on her side.. Me on Mine.. as usual. But 10 min in, I catch her looking at me, squinting. I pause the movie and ask what's up. She tells me that she just feels weird about Friday night (I had told her that I headed out to Get drinks with a friend and watch some football... Which.. I actually Did.. DIdn't watch much football when my date got there, but that's beside the point.) She tells me she thinks I went on a date. I brush it off like.. No I didn't. She said.. well.. your good shoes were out of the closet on your side of the bed. (Ooops... OpSec failure?) I said, well, I just kinda of dressed up.. She's like.. You NEVER dress up unless we're going out. It kind of devolved a little with her scrutinizing every response.

I mean.. she's RIGHT. I DID go on a date. So I stopped playing, and said "What if I DID go on a date? " She looked shocked. I said YOU'RE the one who said "You love me, you think I'm a great husband/father, a great provider.. That you still think I'm handsome... but you just aren't Attracted to me Sexually anymore." She just kind of lowered her eyes, and I could see them starting to tear up. I had filed for divorce 3 months ago, but pulled it back, If we got divorced, we would have to sell a house that we are EXTREMELY well into, she's concerned she'd lose her job (Even though I promised she wouldn't) and she wouldn't have anywhere to go. I said I get it. I said I'll still provide for you, I'll still take care of you, the house, the family, the bills... But we HAVE to have something else in our lives, or we're going to self destruct and fuck up our lives, and ruin our children's futures.

I said.. I needed more. And she tearfully agreed that yes, I did, and that Yes, I deserved more. Se tried to say that she thinks that something is wrong with her, and I stopped her. I said I dont think there's anything wrong with you..or me. This just.. Happens. I suggested that we start seeing other people. She was scared about how that would work. I told her I didn't know. I said I didn't know. We'd have to come up with some ground rules.

I mean, I KNOW she's been seeing someone else off and on... and I told her, wouldn't you like to not have to waste the time and energy Sneaking around and Hiding all of the time? She didn't say anything.

But, as of now, we have agreed to open up our marriage, and see where this road takes us.