So for context, I [HLM25] am on a cruise with my wife [LLF25] and her parents. We have our own room on the opposite side of the ship, and leading up to this trip, we had talked about having a lot of sex. My wife seemed surprisingly down for it and I was so excited! She had been slightly more willing as of late to have some more fun in the bedroom (we were having sex once every two weeks instead of every two months!), and so I thought this trip might be a turnaround point! Alas… not so much. Every opportunity we’ve had, and every time I’ve suggested it or tried to help her get in the mood, she’s turned me down.

Funny enough, the thing that made me snap on this trip was a freaking joke during comedy night. The comedian was an older guy, I think he said he was in his sixties. He’s married and he said during the show “yeah, marriage is great! You can have sex any time… she wants to.” At first I laughed, but then my wife turned and gave me this look and suddenly… the sex-istential (yes it’s dumb but I think it’s funny) moment hit. The more this guy on stage joked about his wife turning him down and leaving him sexually unsatisfied, the more I was like, “oh shit. This is my future.” Normally boomer wife jokes like that annoy me, but I realized now just how much I related to his joke… and I’m freaking 25 years old. This should be the most sexually satisfying time of my life. Instead it’s the most sexually frustrating.

Between that realization, my own building sexual frustration, and the fact that this ship is full of gorgeous, scantily-clad women, I feel so frustrated and I horny I feel like I’m gonna explode