Feels awkward saying this here but oh well.

Been married for 14 years now, great marriage but terrible sex life. My wife is very traditional in bed and extremely vanilla so I genuinely do not enjoy it. We have been talking about this lately and keep pointing fingers. I have hinted at what the issue is and made it clear that me not initiating is because the lack of chemistry, lack of intimacy and loss of connection.

I care about my family and don’t want to separate because of the kids however this issue is always putting me down, always in a bad mood and miserable. The impact it is having on me cannot be tolerated much longer but idk what else to do.

Been throwing the open marriage here and there but yet again, she is very traditional and not accepting this option.

I am 38, she is 35.

Any suggestions?