i do everything. i’m understanding, im agreeable, i keep in shape, i have my own money, im supportive, im a truly good person. im not saying he’s not a good person, because that would be a lie.

but omfg my partner isn’t listening to me.

he isn’t listening to my needs. i am FUCKING BORED of NOT HAVING ANY TYPE OF SEX.

it’s making me fucking crazy, and when i just try to gauge him, it’s all “why are you trying to make me do something i don’t want to do” LIKE OMFG DUDE WHERE. WHERE DO YOU EVER DO SOMETHING YOU DONT WANT.

i offered a bj on friday. we haven’t had any sexually actively for literally 8 months. i want to keep sexually connected to my partner. nothing, he doesn’t care, he doesn’t reach out he doesn’t even act interested.

why am i here? what am i? what the actual fuck?

i am too hot, too young, and too good of a fucking catch to be dealing with the fucking crazy shit. my friends are having sex EVERYONE AROUND ME has sex. all the time!!!

what am i fucking doing????? NOT. i’m not having sex. i’m not being desired. i’m not being chased.

why would i want to be here?????

because i love him. because i’m stupid and i love him. when my stupid fucking monkey brain isn’t soaked in horny soup, he’s perfection.

but GOD i am feeling so fucking fed up. i guess being gaslit into thinking im forcing him to have sex/pity sex, when the reality is we have DONE NOTHI G FOR EIGHT MONTHS…. NOOTTTHHHIIINBBGGGGGGGGFGGGFFGGGGG

CANT BE FORCED INTO ANYTHING IF YOU’RE NOT DOING ANYTHING

also, HUH???

it’s not me. it’s not me. it’s not me. it’s got nothing to do with me. it’s him. it’s him. it’s him.

why would i want to force my partner to have sex with me. no, i would fucking never, because that’s fucked up. i want to be wanted, i want to be chased, i want to have a fucking partner who just FUCKS me. i have never had that in this relationship and now over the course of eight months ive had Z E R O sexual contact.

it if actually forcing me into the anger stage of the death of our relationship.