I’ve (34 HLM) have been reading posts here for awhile. I have been in a pretty sustained db situation for the past four years. While I feel like most of it is due to post partum issues and breastfeeding (our youngest is two), even after trying several times to have conversations about intimacy, affection, and the need for some sort of sex life, I have seen no interest or effort from her (36 LLF)

In the beginning, ten years ago, she was insatiable, after our first child things waned, and they have waned significantly with each subsequent pregnancy.

Lately, the past year, even a passionate hug or kiss is rare (once a month or less) and sex (8 times in the past twelve months) is almost always duty sex. I think that she initiated a nice, maybe twice. After a lot of open communication in the past weeks I am hoping to see a turnaround, but I have come to the point where I am default angry and anxious and emotional/depressed

I am a very sexual person and I crave touch. She knows this and I have told about how I have been feeling lately. She very generically stated that she craves, “connection and time together”

I work shift work full time and our kids have a full slate of activities. Having just started a new job, I am not at the top of my pay scale yet and finances are tight, too tight to go on a lavish weekend away or a fancy date night. I try to do as much as I can in the day to day to help her, I do all the errand running and kid running I can, I do the grocery shopping, and all the cooking when I am home and able to (not at work) I buy her flowers, and we talk extensively about the goings on and whatnot as most couples do.

I don’t know what to do at this point

I’m hoping to see an effort, but we have this conversation time and time again