Good looking, healthy guy here. Locked into a long term marriage, that I have no regrets about…. Except the declining state of our bedroom. Reading so many of your posts, I’m seeing the same refrain over and over again. We all love our spouses, and are committed to make things work. Many of us have kids (mine are all now >18). Just divorcing and leaving it all behind really isn’t a realistic option, nor a desired one.

But I’m also reading of many marriages that are much younger than mine… and the misery is the same. The fire of intimacy; the desire for sexual pleasure - is all but gone. How long must we suffer with unmet needs? I didn’t sign up for celibacy!

And I admit that our bedroom is not nearly as dead as some here. But the long and abiding trend is very clear…. She doesn’t want it anymore with me. I’m a chore to her. And it’s too fucking bad, because I actually bring the goods every time. She’s tearing off the sheets in ecstasy…. And then has zero desire for it again for months. What the actual hell?!? I would imagine orgasms would be addicting. But apparently I’m wrong about that.

Heartfelt attempts to communicate about this only leads to tears and withdrawal. It’s painful to do and I pay an even greater price for even bringing it up.

But I have real, human needs too.

I guess I’m just exhausted with trying to fix a problem that seems to have no genuine, lasting solution. I’ve arrived at the place where I am looking for a FWB. Not sure that it will fix everything, but I do know ONE thing that it will.

Sorry if I sound jaded, but it’s been a long ride and I’ve all but lost hope that a dying bedroom can actually be brought to life again.

Have any of you ever experienced a lasting turnaround? I guess I already know the answer to that… As you would probably no longer be a part of this group, if that were so.

But I’m listening… Prove me wrong.