I'm a female in a 7 year out of 8 total sexless and loveless marriage. He appears to be completely asexual. I've never heard the words, "I love you." Weekends are worse because I have to "play house." I have been walking around tearful and sad all day. Now, I'm sitting in a car and my tears are pouring.

I truly dislike this absolute loliness, suffering in darkness, lack of any form of touch or affection, and feeling used as a golden goose that is withering away.

It has affected my self esteem. I'm invisible. Wish I could find someone but I have been utterly unsuccessful.

I get massages at a local professional spa every 3-4 weeks I also have a very fulfilling job and social circle.

Nonetheless, I have moments that I want to run away. The above is not the same as feeling loved or safe in someone's arms, or being desired.

How do others cope? How do you keep from becoming tearful from time to time? The idea of living sexless and loveless for the rest of my life feels like a a hole in my heart. If anyone else is in this type of situation, how are you surviving?