Less than six months ago I almost pulled the trigger. Had an apartment ready and everything. Then the hysterical bonding kicked in and I foolishly thought to myself "maybe something inside of her awoke or clicked on! Maybe we'll be okay..." Wrong.

We're back in a big dry spell. It hasn't even been that long but it already feels long, if that makes sense. It's just so apparent to me now that she doesn't have anywhere near the same sex drive as I do. We're so far apart on the spectrum. And these ends will never meet.

But it's so hard to call it quits. To separate myself from this life I've built over the last 10 years. How much worse do I need it to get? It feels like I don't have to make this decision which is why it's so hard just to make this decision. I need strength. I need to believe and take action to prepare myself for what I need to do. I will be okay. Things will actually be amazing.

I have to let go of "ok" and go after something much better. Something I actually need... and deserve.