I closed my eyes and leaned back, the humming in my ears was deafening, my body began to vibrate at a very specific frequency and it felt like I was strapped into a spaceship or rollercoaster heading off into orbit. My friend (trip sitter: someone who helps guide you through the experience and ensures your safety) reassured me that it was normal and part of the experience and that I should embrace it so I did, I leaned into it full-tilt and when I did I was transported into another dimension. With my eyes closed and head back I began to move through what I can only describe as an astral plane, rocketing chaotically through the space until I saw this big wall of really bright and vibrant colors, the center column supporting this universe was a giant and ancient face with an open mouth and I was terrified because I was on a collision course with its mouth. I approached nearer and nearer, much to my chagrin, and was swallowed up and rocketed through what seemed like a tunnel or strange wormhole into a dark place, a low-lit marble room , the floor patterned like a black and white chess board with a large and ancient looking archway at one end where a tesseract glowing a dim gold color appeared. It started moving towards me, shifting and changing in and out, increasing in brightness the closer it got to my astral form. When it stopped in front of me I felt an incredibly mischievous presence and saw what appeared to be jesters with long skinny arms and legs wearing billowy striped carnivalé costumes and they were putting on a show for me. Each one of the panels of the tesseract contained a jester, as it rotated and morphed I became acquainted with each of them. I became overwhelmingly self-conscious and shameful because I started feeling like I might’ve urinated on myself (I hadn’t but it felt like I had because of the BP drop and my extremities getting cold and clammy concentrating warmth in my head and core) and they started making fun of me for it. They would lean way back and then lean way in and give me the middle-finger shouting “fuck you” and the more I recoiled and felt fear the more they teased me. I kept repeating to them “I’m afraid, I’m worried, I’m ashamed. I this and I that”. They mocked me “I I I Me Me Me” until it finally clicked and I realized that it’s not an I, or me experience (life) it’s an us, we thing and we are a collective of consciousness and experiences that are shared across space and time. The second I communicated that I understood that love is the way and connection to humanistic emotions and things such as ego were not serving me well, they stopped flipping me off and kind of clapped for me. One of the jesters exclaimed “ah, he gets it!” to which another replied “he isn’t ready, he’s not prepared don’t do it to him” and that’s when the main jester guided a form right in front of me, presenting it forward as though he were showing me a prized possession. I saw what I recognized to be the face of the devil, a skull with little bone spurs sticking out here and there, black sinew stretched across the cheek bones and very sharp and gnarly teeth wearing a leather strap crown with bone spurs sticking out of it. The strange thing was I felt no fear or shame or uncomfortableness at all when facing it, I exclaimed to him that I understood that we were one and the same. He could not exist without my recognition of him and I could not exist without his recognition of me and that he wasn’t good or bad, he were simply a being charged with overseeing a realm or dimension. The Jesters were excited and they collectively agreed that it was time for me to transcend to the next stop in my inter dimensional journey and the reached forward and grabbed me by the third eye and jettisoned me to the next place. I flew forward through space with this floating devil head and we were passing by what looked like a planet of straight fire with a fiery ring around it that was called the hellscape dimension. Though it sounds terrifying it wasn’t at all, this devil and I communicated and he explained to me that the hellscape wasn’t a place of pain an anguish but simply a dimension where people just lived their lives normally (just in a fiery state) no one was suffering they were just simply existing which wasn’t great because they failed to transcend into enlightenment and move to a better plane so they were dealing with finding the enlightenment to move on. The true hell is here on earth with us, in our minds in the negative interactions and experiences we have that are torturous and traumatic. The way we respond and choose to live our lives is what decides where we exist after we die. I accepted the facts then he escorted me to a new higher plane of existence that was the plane of knowledge. I landed on what looked like a sprawling golden road that was maybe 3 meters wide and in front of me was a being of some indiscernible nature. Long flowing robes and light emanated from him as he walked me along this road, pointing out to me the glowing large orbs around us, they were planets/dimensions elsewhere but the road we were on was the path of truth and light between these worlds. Walking along I saw into these realms and recognized the beings as being kind and knowledgeable, their pursuits only driven by progressing their collective knowledge and understanding, incredibly loving civilizations with wisdom being the pinnacle of their desire. I moved along and began to understand that to gain knowledge and wisdom as supreme as this I would have to live in a state of love and acceptance in my human life, bettering others through kindness and generosity. Love was the key to all things. We reached the end of the road and he stood aside, a hand outstretched to the archway in front of us. He halted me and told me I’d seen a lot on my journey but I could only choose to take one thing back with me, the rest would be fleeting and eventually disappear, “Love or knowledge” is what he asked. I chose love and he exclaimed “he will see you now”. I guided myself through the door and came into a space where I was floating and it felt like I was inside of an omnipotent being and it were inside of me. We were the same but very different, as in I knew I was of the same matter but nowhere close to the level it was, it was supreme. I believed it was a or the creator and I kind of floated as a spirit energy around this strange consciousness that looked the color of cotton candy clouds with firing synapses popping off all over the place in grand fashion. I felt again the message that I am you and you are me and we are all interconnected as one and only through love would the world begin to change back into the state it was meant to be, it’s inhabitants along with it. Then my phone dinged and I came back into my body and the experience was over. It was ten minutes long from start to finish but felt like an eternity.

This was the most blissful and life changing experience I’ve ever had and it’s been a year since the trip. I feel no need to go back to that space because I received the message, but I must admit I do long to see them all again, even the maniacally playful jesters.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading. If you’re on the fence about it, jump in both feet with no life jacket. I can’t recommend it enough.