Title. Does anyone else find it dehumanizing and ridiculous that the only realistic option for many of us to move forward barring abandoning the US altogether, with or without DACA is marriage to a US citizen? I'm a 24M Filipino who came to the US legally, but has been in legal limbo from the moment I turned 18 and aged out of my parents' STILL pending immigrant visa and this doomer realization never seems to escape my train of thought every passing day. To many of my US citizen friends, my life seems "ideal" on paper-- I'm a second generation college grad with a STEM degree, make almost six figs from combined contractor and freelance work, drive a nice car and can save up while also being able to make ends meet... I'm "tall for a Filipino" and consider myself above average in looks, things I'm all VERY fortunate for as I know many of my fellow "unDACAmented" are barely struggling to keep a roof over their head or put food on the table by comparison. I'll admit that prior to discovering communities and hearing other peoples' testimonies online, I would always feel bitter and spiteful that my friends would always get to visit other countries while I would have to make do with traveling to Las Vegas or the Grand Canyon, and then I realized comparison is the thief of joy and I should be thankful about all of the things and privileges I DO have. But goddamn, I know that even though life isn't fair I just can't help but feel upset that people in similar circumstances like me basically have to deal with always being a third-class citizen indefinitely.

I've been trying my best to work on myself both physically and mentally, whether that's hitting the gym, grooming myself better and working on my personality so as to not have a victim mentality from my immigrant struggles, yet it feels like I won't ever be able to get married and settle down with someone. One of my biggest fears is having a relationship develop naturally, and then when it comes time to disclose my circumstances, BAM... right back at square one because my partner wants to travel the world and can't feel "tied down" to someone who can't leave the country. I know that if someone truly loves you then they won't care, my first girlfriend felt that way but of course look how that turned out... My anxiety for the future as I approach my mid 20's are making me heavily consider just cutting my losses here in the US and moving back to the PH with all of my assets/capital/savings and settling down in an upscale place there using my degree and work experience to just live comfortably but cope with having to leave my true home and friends behind. I'm too American to be Filipino but too Filipino to be American...

I don't know where I'm going with this, but if you got this far, thank you for reading. I feel better having typed all of this out.