You should be humping inanimate objects.

Yes, you own the latest FuckStick5000 because you’re a dirty girl who stuffs her cunt regularly, but the point of humping is not to simulate sex. You hump because it’s not as satisfying as your fingers or toys, because it reminds you that you’re needy, and because there is something delightfully submissive about the physical exertion just for a bit of pleasure. It’s fun to watch, too.

Make it part of your playtime. More advanced holes can jump straight to grinding their bare cunt on a shoe and licking it clean; beginners, I’ll make it easy for you. Next time you’re guiltily rubbing your slimy fuckhole under the covers, take the pillow from under your head, flip onto your stomach, and put it between your legs. Hump like a little doggy. Grind. Moan. It won’t be as satisfying, but we’ve established that isn’t the point.

It’s a nice bonus that you can sleep at night smelling your cunt juices on your face.