A bit of a long post, sorry, but I want to provide some background.

I’m 52 years old, my wife is 45, we’ve been together for 21 years, and we love each other very much. Our sex life has always been great, but also pretty vanilla, although we’re also very non-judgemental about each other’s fantasies.

None of us has had sex with anyone else in all the years we’ve been together.

These past couple of years, I’ve started to warm up to the idea of hotwife/cuckolding - or rather “stag/vixxening” if you can call it that. That is to say, rather than some humiliation-roleplaying-thing, I’m turned on by the thought of intimacy and sensuality, and – yes, love – between her and me while she’s being fucked by another man.

Anyway, a couple of months back, when she mentioned some black guy being hot, I jumped at the opportunity and asked her, if she’d like for me to find one for her. The fact that she didn’t dismiss the idea right off the bat was enough to make my heart race.

Right then and there, we didn’t talk much more – but the following weeks the subject came up now and again, mostly just in passing. And the next time we had a whole afternoon to ourselves, and had planned for some sex, I surprised her with an erotic short story I’d written for her – with thinly disguised versions of ourselves as the main characters, and a black guy visiting us. While she read it, I put on a slide show in the background on our tv with images of hard, black cocks that I’d collected for her from the internet.

It was a big success! She got very, VERY aroused, and we had some wonderful sex and she had a super huge orgasm.

The next day we talked again, and that’s when she told me, that she thought it would be a bad idea to turn this fantasy into reality. And the reason she gave has made me think.

She is concerned for me.

She thinks that maybe I wouldn’t enjoy myself as much as I imagine.

She thinks that I risk ending up doing serious emotional harm to myself.

Now, obviously, she knows me better than anybody, and I respect her immensely, so I take those concerns very seriously. Honestly, I don’t know if she’s right or not. What if he satisfies her better than I ever could? Would it shatter my sexual confidence?

When I was much younger, I used to be very jealous (that cost me my first marriage), but over the years, as I’ve matured, and as our marriage has proven very strong, I have shaken the fear of losing her.

She still hasn’t ruled the idea out 100% - but for us to really do it, I’d need to convince her that I can take it. But do I want to?

So.

My question to you - apart from just general ‘your thoughts’, which of course is also very welcome - is this:

Have any of you regretted going into the lifestyle?

When people share their experiences with wife sharing/cuckolding, we always only get the postive stories. That cannot be all there is. Do you have any negative experiences? Things, you’ve regretted doing?

Any advise is appreciated, thank you.