I'm the lucky boyfriend of an open-minded and sex-loving girlfriend (in her twenties). We were drinking a few weeks ago and I came clean about wishing I could see her have sex with another guy. She readily agreed and let me know that she was always down to try things when I hinted at it in the previous months. I end up inviting this stranger over (from an advert on Fabswingers that she had been cool with for months) and they end up fucking after we played some strip truth-or-dare. Super hot, and she was so natural, no nerves at all. It ended up being a threesome of sorts, but mostly I held her hand or ate her out. It was very intense to see her smiling and content wrapped up in his arms after kissing him.

After he left, we had some of the most intense bonding we've ever had and shared a lot of love. She expressed her enjoyment and gratefulness in being able to explore other men - something she never expected. She also said that she prefers my dick and my gentle approach, but that he fucked her in an aggresive way that was exciting to her. Truthfully, we were both a bit disappointed because he was too drunk to perform, and she agreed to try it again in the future if we set it up more properly. However, we haven't spoken much of it since, nor that my true desires are for a regular cuckolding dynamic. I just feel too fucking nervous to bring it up. Everytime. Even after what we shared.

She's really quite blunt and never talks about sex despite being so open to it, so I often wonder how she really feels about things. I did recently try to explain what a 'cuck' was, and showed her some of the captions and post I have saved from cuckold subreddits, but she didn't really seem too interested, just - "It doesn't hurt to have those desires". Or, "...if that's what you want". I didn't feel like she was wanting to engage with it, so I dropped it. I think maybe she wasn't in the mindset to talk about it at the time, but still I feel silly bring it up again.

Right now, there's some distance between us for a few weeks while she's at her parents abroad, but I was hoping to text her about this. (Our communication is generally so much better over text.) I really want to get her thoughts on exploring a true cuckold dynamic where she has a regular bull, and clear up any doubts that she would enjoy it, if she had any. If it all went smoothly, I could set up with the guys that have been messaging me. They're so her type, it would be incredible.

But I just feel so nervous about the rejection or what she would think of me as a man / boyfriend, I suppose? Maybe if it would change things? She's pegged me before and we tried chastity on a whim after visiting a sex shop once. She loved both of those things, so it's not the freakiest jump in kinks. And we're very close and been together a long time now. I just can't seem to get over the anxiety. What's wrong with me? lol. Any advice?