I love this kink, it causes me the biggest orgasm. It gets me so turned on. I love talking to my wife about it. She gets turned on (but has been very clear she will never do it). I will get super taboo too, like talking about her ex, who was black and hung and fucked her real good, and ill try and encourage her to consider doing it. Texting while I eat her out. Shit like that. Like, in the moment I am totally up for it and want to do it all foreal, no fear just sexual excitement..

And then I cum and boom, those feelings are GONE. I Feel immediate regret. I worry if I am pushing her to her ex. I worry if I am sinning. If I am offending God. I feel ashamed.

I am not a weak guy by any means. Very much head strong and a leader of most situations I'm in, most groups I'm in. You would imagine me as more a bull than a cuck. So my Post Nut self just can't understand why my horny self is even into this. But a few hours later I'm right back to it.