Is this normal??

So I developed this kink back when I was dating. Me n my Gf were still testing the waters and she would generally hook up over tinder or chat websites. The guys were generally not aware of our arrangement, I would mostly hang out with her before and after the date. And wait outside her residence while she was hooking up.

Once a certain guy showed up early while I was still with her, it was a small studio room and in the heat of the moment I ended up hiding under the bed. I couldn't see anything but heard everything. And it was Hot!! The risque , the silliness of it.. I was hooked. After that I spent many a nights hiding under bed , listening and jerking off, as my gf was being plowed on the bed above me.

Fast forward to now. Got married ( not the the same girl) When bulls are no longer guys who are unaware of what's happening and it's normal to stay in the room and watch, I feel a yearning to go and crawl under the bed. I miss the feeling of being there and not being there at the same time. I miss feeling the bed creak over me as my wife starts to moan.

I haven't talked to my wife about it yet. I plan to do so soon.

So to cucks / couples : Is this normal ? Any other couples who like to do similar things ? Should I try it without telling the bull that I'll be there?

To bulls : How would you feel if the husband comes out from under the bed, esp if you weren't aware of it beforehand? Or should I stay hiding like I used to back in the day.

Thanks for reading

Hope to get some advice from this wonderful community.